
THE AMAZONS 



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A FARCE IN THREE ACTS 





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THE AMAZONS 



The Amazons 



A FARCICAL ROMANCE IN 

THREE ACTS 



ARTHUR W. PINERO 



All rights reserved under the International Copyright Act. 
Performance forbidden, and right of representation reserved. 
Application for the right of performing the above piece must 
be made to the publishers. 



BOSTON 



THE PERSONS OF THE PLAY. 



Bareington, Yiscount Litteely. -t-->'0 ^ ^ ^ 
Galfeed, Eael of Tweenwayes. \ ^\ 
Andre, Count de Geival. ^r*^ ^ 

Rev. Roger Minchin. \ ^ ^-^ 

FiTTON (a Gamekeeper'). 
YouATT (a Servant). 
Gets (a Poacher). 

MiEiAM, Maechioness OF Castlejordan. 

Lady Noeline Belturbet, 

Lady Wilhelmina Beltuebet, y(her daughters). 

Lady Thomasin Beltuebet, 

"Seegeant" Shutee. 



The scene is laid first in ** The Tangle,'^ an overgrown comer 
of Overcote Park, and afterwards at Overcote Hall. Great 
Overcote, as everybody knoios, is a two-hours' railway jour- 
ney from town. The events of the play occur during a 
single day in a fine September. 



COPYBIGHT, 1895, BY ARTHUR W. PiKEBO. 



All rights reserved. 




INTRODUCTORY NOTE. 



Although ** The Amazons " was presented to the pub- 
lic a couple of months earlier than "The Second Mrs. 
Tanqueray," it was actually a later work; indeed, Mr. 
Pinero may be said to have written this merry and fan- 
tastic little play by way of relaxation after the more serious 
mental effort involved in the composition of the famous 
drama which told the tragic story of Paula Tanqueray. 
Curiously enough, this delightful " farcical romance," in 
the writing of which Mr. Pinero was apparently prompted 
by no more weighty motive than the indulgence of his 
own playful fancy, for all the amusement it was worth, 
stands in order of composition immediately between " The 
Second Mrs. Tanqueray " and " The Notorious Mrs. Ebb- 
smith." It may thus be regarded as a remarkable evi- 
dence of its author's versatility. Here he attempted no 
criticism of life, he sought to solve no problem of morality, 
sociology, or psychology ; he merely permitted himself to 
dally with the "mannish woman" idea in the lightest, 
gentlest spirit of satire, and in a most whimsical mood of 
romance. In the Tangle of Overcote Park we seem to 
hear distant laughing echoes from the Forest of Arden, 
and in Lady NoeHne Belturbet and Barrington, Viscount 
Litterly, we fancy we recognise the descendants of Rosa- 
lind and Orlando. 

Mr. Arthur Chudleigh produced "The Amazons " at 
the Court Theatre on Tuesday, March 7th, 1893, when 



THE AMAZONS, 



its reception at the hands of the public was very cordial. 
The following is a copy of the first night programme : — 

Programme. 

ON TUESDAY, MARCH 7th, 1893, 
WILL BE ACTED FOR THE FIRST TIME 

THE AMAZONS 
An Original Farcical Romance. 

BY 

A. W. PINERO. 



Galfred, Earl of Tweenwayes 
Barrington, Viscount Litterly 
Andre, Count de Grival 
Rev. Roger Minchin 
FiLTON {A Gamekeeper ) 
You ATT {A Servant ) . 
Orts {A Poacher) 



Mr. Weedon Grossmith. 

Mr. F. Kerr. 

Mr. Elliott. 

Mr. J. Beauchamp. 

Mr. W. QuiNTON. 

Mr. COMPTON COUTTS. 

Mr. R. Nainby. 



Miriam, Marchioness of Castlhjordan . 
Lady Noeline Belturbet 



Lady Wilhelmina Bel- 
turbet 

Lady Thomasin Beltur- 
bet 

"Sergeant" Shuter 



Miss Rose Leclercq. 
Miss Lily Hanbury. 
( By Permission of Mr, 
Beerbohm. Tree.) 

Miss Ellalink Terriss. 

Miss Pattie Browne. 
{Her First Appearance in 
England.) 
Miss Marianne Caldwell. 



The scene is laid first in " The Tangle," an overgrown corner of 
Overcote Park, and afterwards at Overcote Hall. Great Overcote, 
as everybody knows, is a two-hours' railway journey from town. The 
events of the play occur during a single day in a fine September. 

The scenery is painted by Mr. T. W. Hall. 

The music in the Play has been composed by Mr. Edward Jones. 



INTRODUCTORY NOTE. 5 

** The Amazons " ran at the Court Theatre until July 
8th, by which date a hundred and eleven performances 
had been given, a record which spells success, although 
it does not equal the figures of Mr. Pinero's robuster and 
less fantastic farces, such as "The Magistrate," "The 
Schoolmistress," and '* Dandy Dick." 

A successful tour of the provinces was made under the 
auspices of Mr. Fred G. Latham and the late T. W. 
Robertson, while at the Antipodes considerable pros- 
perity has attended the merry little play, Messrs. Brough 
and Boucicault having been its Australian sponsors. 

The greatest success, however, yet achieved by "The 
Amazons," has been in America. Mr. Daniel Frohman 
produced it quite unostentatiously at the Lyceum Theatre, 
New York, and its triumph was immediate. The fresh- 
ness, delicate humour, and unconventionality of the piece, 
and the quaint prettiness of the girls' masculine attire, 
captivated the playgoers of New York, and " The Ama- 
zons " became the talk of the town. Presented first in 
February, 1894, it ran for eighteen or nineteen weeks 
in New York, the demand for seats being so great as to 
justify the management in raising the prices in certain 
parts of the house. Similar popularity has accompanied 
the piece throughout the United States, where it is about 
\o commence its second season " on the road." 

Malcolm C. Salaman. 
London, /««^, 1895. 



^1^' 



.'' 



..1" 



THE AMAZONS. 

THE FIRST ACT. 

The scene represents a thickly-wooded, overgrown 
corner of Overcote Park. There is a small clear- 
ing up to a dense thicket and a ragged hedge, 
which is broken by an old Jive-barred gate, while 
prominently in the foreground are, on the left the 
stump of a felled tree, and on the right an old tree 
with a wide hollow in its trunk. Beyond the gate 
is a prospect of a woodland, pierced by gleams of 
bright light. It is a fine, warm morning in Sep- 
tember ; some golden leaves are on the trees ^ a few 
have fallen. The whole scene is warmly coloured 
and poetical in suggestion. 

YouATT, an aged servant in livery, opens the gate for 
the Rev. Roger Minchin, who advances on to 
the cleari?ig. Minchin is a type of the country 
parson of the old school, white-haired, red-faced, 
hearty in manner. 

Minchin. 
No sign of her ladyship here, Youatt. 

YoUATT. 

We'll find her, Mr. Minchin. 



8 THE AMAZONS. 

MiNCHIN. 

[ Wiping his brow.'] Ouf ! 

YOUATT. 

[Closing the gate.~\ My lady and the family are 
very partial to the Tangle o' fine days. 

MiNCHIN. 

The Tangle ? 

YoUATT. 

That's what the family call this corner o' the 
park, sir. [Zooming off and removing his cap.] 'Ere is 
my lady. 

[Miriam, Marchioness of Castlejordan, 
approaches^ carrying a camp-stool. She 
is a tall, splendidly-handsome woman of 
middle-age. 

Lady Castlejordan. 

\_Shaking hands heartily with Minchin.] Mr. 
Minchin ! 

MiNCHIN. 

How are you ? 

Lady Castlejordan. 
You so seldom come to see me. Shall we walk 
back to the Hall.> 

Minchin. 
\Puffing?[ If you don't mind, I — 



THE AMAZONS. 9 

Lady Castlejordan. 

Get your wind — certainly. \To Youatt.] Has 
Shuter gone to the station to meet Lord Noel ? 

Youatt. 
I b'lieve so, m'lady. 

[Youatt goes away through the gateway ?[ 

Lady Castlejordan. 
Well ! I see what you're thinking about. 

MiNCHIN. 

Lord Noel — that's Lady Noeline ? 

Lady Castlejordan. 
From your point of view, yes. 

MiNCHIN. 

Oh, dear, oh, dear ! 

Lady Castlejordan. 

Noel has been staying with Mrs. Vipont in town 
for some weeks. The Viponts have been kept in 
London, you know, by the late session. I've 
missed Noel sadly. \^Referri?ig to her watch.'] He 
will be at the Hall in half-an-hour. 

MiNCHIN. 

Will he ! And your two other gir — boys ? 



lo THE AMAZONS. 

Lady Castlejordan. 

They spent their August in Scotland; they've 
been home some days. [ Walking about restlessly. '\ 
It chafes me so to think I am not at the station 
myself to meet my eldest son. 

MiNCHIN. 

You've deputed — whom did I hear you say ? 

Lady Castlejordan. 
Sergeant Shuter. 

MiNCHIN. 

Man or woman ? 

Lady Castlejordan. 
From your point of view, woman, I suppose. 

MiNCHIN. 

Why Sergeant ? 

Lady Castlejordan. 

Late husband held that rank in Castle Jordan's 
old regiment. 

MiNCHIN. 

What duties does she — he — perform here ? 

Lady Castlejordan. 

Teaches my boys boxing, fencing, athletics gene- 
rally. 



THE AMAZONS. n 

MiNCHIN. 

[^Groaning.'] Oh ! 

Lady Castlejordan. 

A splendid fellow. At the same time, I should 
dearly like to have gone to Scrumleigh station to 
meet Noel. 

MiNCHIN. 

You're detained here, I gather ? 

Lady Castlejordan. 

Detained ! I don't venture beyond the park now- 
a-days more than I can help. You know why, 
surely ? 

MiNCHIN. 

H'm! Well — 

Lady Castlejordan. 

You know what they call me outside, at Great 
Overcote, and Little Overcote, and at Scrumleigh 
— ah, even in London ! 

MiNCHIN. 

Yes, yes. 

Lady Castlejordan. 

The Eccentric Lady Castlejordan. [^Scornfully.'] 
Eccentric ! 

MiNCHIN. 

My dear Lady Castlejordan, the truth is that I've 
presumed to call on you this morning in the hope 



12 THE AMAZONS, 

that I may be permitted to f»^sJ0srtly reason with 
you on this very subject. 

Lady Castlejordan. 
Again ? 

MiNCHIN. 

Once more. 

Lady Castlejordan. 

Sit down. 

\They sit ; she on the camp-stool^ he on the 
stump of a tree. 

MiNCHIN. 

To begin with, it would be disingenuous to con- 
ceal from you that I do constantly hear very severe 
strictures passed upon your line of conduct. 

Lady Castlejordan. 

You've heard them for the last ten years, ever 
since my husband died. 

MiNCHIN. 

But these strictures are more severe now than 
ever, and with some justice. When your children 
were children there was small harm in your play- 
fully regarding them as boys and allowing them to 
romp and riot. But to-day here are three young 
women — 

Lady Castlejordan. 

No! 



THE AMAZONS. 13 

MiNCHIN. 

Three strapping young women — 

Lady Castlejordan. 
No! 

MiNCHIN. 

I will repeat, I do repeat, three bouncing young 
women ! 

Lady Castlejordan. 

Well, in detail, I admit my children are perhaps 
what you describe. But in disposition, in mind, in 
muscle, they are three fine, stalwart young fellows. 

MiNCHIN. 

But Great Overcote, and Little Overcote, and 
Scrumleigh do not look upon them as — 

Lady Castlejordan. 

Are Great Overcote, and Little Overcote, and 
Scrumleigh competent judges of my bitter heart- 
burnings and disappointments? You knew Jack, 
my husband ? 

MiNCHIN. 

Ah, yes, indeed. 

Lady Castlejordan. 
What was he ? 

MiNCHIN. 

A gentle giant. A grand piece of muscular 
humanity. In frame, the Vikings must have been 
of the same pattern. 



14 THE AMAZON-:^: 

Lady Castlejordan. 
And you remember me as I was twenty years ago ? 

MiNCHIN. 

[Looking at herj] I've no excuse for forgetting. 

Lady Castlejordan. 
I was a fit mate for my husband ? 

MiNCHIN. 

Perfect. 

Lady Castlejordan. 

Even in Jack's time I never scaled less than ten 
stone, and he could lift me as if I were a sawdust 
doll. Old friend — ! Oh, old friend, what a son 
my son and Jack's ought to have been ! 

\_She goes to the gate and leans upon it, turn- 
ing her back to Minchin, who has also 
risen. 

Minchin. 

But — but — but it didn't please Providence to 
send you a son. 

Lady Castlejordan. 
[Beating the gate.'] Oh! Oh! 

Minchin. 

Come, come, do learn to view the matter re- 
signedly! 



THE AMAZONS. 15 

Lady Castlejordan. 
Girls ! girls ! 

MiNCHIN. 

It's an old story now — 

Lady Castlejordan. 
Girls ! 

MiNCHIN. 

Why despise girls ? Many people like girls. Bless 
my heart, / like girls ! 

Lady Castlejordan. 

You can recall Noeline's arrival. I was sure she 
was going to be a boy — so was Jack. I knew it — 
so did Jack. The child was to have been christened 
Noel, Jack's second name. 

MiNCHIN. 

Yes, I was up at the Hall that night, smoking 
with Castlejordan to keep him quiet. 

Lady Castlejordan. 

Poor dear, I remember his bending over me after- 
wards and whispering " Damn it, Miriam, you've 
lost a whole season's hunting for nothing ! " Then 
the second — 

MiNCHIN. 

Lady Wilhelmina. 



16 THE AMAZONS. 

Lady Castlejordan. 

Yes, Billy came next. Jack wouldn't speak to me 
for a couple of months after that, the only fall-out 
we ever had. 

MiNCHIN. 

But your third, Lady Thomasin — 

Lady Castlejordan. 

Dearest Tommy! Oh, by that time Jack and I 
had agreed to regard anything that was born to us 
as a boy and to treat it accordingly, and for the 
rest of his life my husband taught our three chil- 
dren — there never was another — to ride, fish, 
shoot, swim, fence, fight, wrestle, throw, run, jump, 
until they were as hardy as Indians and their 
muscles burst the sleeves of their jackets. And, 
when Jack went, I continued their old training. Of 
course, I — I recognise my boys' little deficiencies, 
but I'm making the best of the great disappoint- 
ment of my life, and I — well, call me the eccentric 
Lady Castlejordan ! What do I care ? 

\_She sits, wiping her eyes, 

MiNCHIN. 

Ah, well, well ! I've great sympathy. But I 
really do think that the time has arrived now — 

Lady Castlejordan. 

Now! Pardon me, but you can't know what 
you're talking about. 



THE AMAZONS, 17 

MiNCHIN. 

Eh? 

Lady Castlejordan. 

You haven't forgotten, have you, that the title 
went to my husband's brother in default of my 
being the mother of a — of a complete boy ? 

MiNCHIN. 

Of course I haven't. 

Lady Castlejordan. 

And that this man, the present Lord Castlejor- 
dan. a wizen creature without shoulders, has a son ? 

MiNCHIN. 

I know that. 

Lady Castlejordan. 

A son ! And Lady Castlejordan a wisp of a 
woman with a mouth like a rabbit's! And they 
have a son ! 

MiNCHIN. 

Lord Litterly. He's at Oxford. 

Lady Castlejordan. 

He has just come down. And what do you 
think ! That young man has carried everything 
before him at the University — everything ! 



i8 THE AMAZONS. 

MiNCHIN. 

Why, I heard he'd failed even to take a pass 
degree. 

Lady Castlejordan. 

Bother his degree ! He was first string in the 
mile and quarter-mile against Cambridge at Queen's 
Club ; he got his cricket blue and came within two 
of making his century at Lord's ; and in Rugby 
football he was the best three-quarter back in the 
Oxford fifteen that's been known for the last five- 
and-twenty years. Oh ! the torture of it ! 

MiNCHIN. 

Now, come, come ! I don't see — ! 

Lady Castlejordan. 

You don't see that this is the son Jack and I 
ought to have had ! No ! {pacing to and fro] Heav- 
ens, if this young man had been sickly, stunted, 
freckled, weak, anaemic, red-eyed, narrow-chested — ! 

MiNCHIN. 

Hush, hush ! 

Lady Castlejordan. 

Or, better still, humpbacked, with one short leg, 
it might have made me a more contented, gentler 
woman 1 But as it is — 

MiNCHIN. 

Now, now 1 



THE AMAZONS. 19 

Lady Castlejordan. 

And you choose this moment for suggesting that 
I should look matters straight in the face and realize 
the melancholy maternal muddle I've made. 

MiNCHIN. 

You know, I've had an idea for some time past — 
but, there, you're not on friendly terms with the 
present Lord Castlejordan and his family ? 

Lady Castlejordan. 
\_Indignantly.'\ Friendly terms ! 

MiNCHIN. 

Because it has often struck me that it might be a 
small consolation to you to know this young man — 



Lady Castlejordan. 



Never ! 



MiNCHIN. 

Tut, tut! You might grow to be fond of Lord 
Litterly. 

Lady Castlejordan. 

Fond of him! Fond of the youth that Nature — 
Nature, for whom I've done so much! — has taken 
from me and given to that insignificant little woman ! 
No, never shall one of us exchange a word even with 
one of them ! Never, I say ! Never ! 

MiNCHIN. 

Oh, dear, oh, dear 



20 THE AMAZONS. 

[Lady Wilhelmina Belturbet enters^ below the 
hedge. She is a sweet-looking girl of nineteen^ 
quiet., gentle and feminine. Her attire is a com- 
promise between a boy's and a woman's ; her " Nor- 
folk " jacket reaches almost to her knees and her 
lower limbs are eficased in stout leathern gaiters. 
She carries a fishing-rod in its case and., across her 
shoulders^ an ordinary wicker fishifig-basket. 

Wilhelmina. 

Why, it's Mr. Minchin ! \ Shaking hands with him 
warmly?^ Ah, mother dear ! Mr. Minchin ' 

Minchin. 
And, how are you, hey ? Any sport ? 

Wilhelmina. 

I'm on my way down. There's a little too much 
wind, I fancy ; [^slipping her basket from her shoulders^ 
I've turned into the shelter here to tie a fly. 

Minchin. 
\_Opening the basket.'] Let me help you. 

Lady Castlejordan. 
What is Tommy doing this morning ? 

Wilhelmina. - 
Giving the grey mare a lesson over the hurdles. 

Minchin. 
H'm, dangerous work ! 



THE AMAZONS. 21 

Lady Castlejordan. 

[ Walking away.] Please don't put such ideas 
into my boys' heads. 

[MiNCHiN and Wilhelmina sif side-by-side 
on the stump of the tree^ he with her 
tacklebook in his hand. 

MiNCHIN. 

\_Futting on his spectacles.'] Now then ! What are 
your flies ? 

Wilhelmina. 

Red Septembers and Mottled Spinners. 

MiNCHIN. 

Ah, you're a knowing one. \_Ife ties the fly. 

Wilhelmina. 
Have you and mother been talking ? 

MiNCHIN. 

What d'ye think we have been doing — playing 
leap-frog ? 

Wilhelmina. 
I mean talking about us gir — boys ? 

MiNCHIN. 

H'm ! Pliers. 

Wilhelmina. 
\Handing the pliers.] I guess you have. Mr. 



22 THE AMAZONS. 

Minchin, dear, mother isn't worried about us, is she 
— me particularly ? 

Minchin. 

I can answer that. No she isn't — / am. Silk. 

WiLHELMINA. 

[Giving the silk to him?\ I'm glad she's not wor- 
ried. Because, do you know, I'm afraid I'm going 
to be a great sorrow to her. 

Minchin. 
You! 

WiLHELMINA. 

I've a foreboding I shall turn out badly. 

Minchin. 
In what way .'' 

WiLHELMINA. 

Oh, I'm getting worse every day, Mr. Minchin. 
I — I'm becoming so very effeminate. \He looks at 
her for a moment^ then chuckles. '\ Hush, hush ! 

Minchin. 
Ho, ho ! Scissors. Go on. 

WiLHELMINA. 

It's nice to talk to you. Shall I tell you some- 
thing very — well, rather — funny about Tommy 
and myself ? 



THE AMAZONS. 23 

MiNCHIN. 

Do, if you ought to. 

WiLHELMINA. 

I don't think I ought to. 

MiNCHIN. 

{Gravely?^ Well then, my dear, if you are at all 
uncertain about it perhaps it would be better — 

WiLHELMINA. 

Yes, you're right. 

MiNCHIN. 

Perhaps it would be better that you should tell 
me. 

WiLHELMINA. 

Oh ! Well, you know Tommy and I have been 
staying up at Drumdurris with little Lady Drum. 

MiNCHIN. 

Have you ? 

WiLHELMINA. 

There was a very large house-party, men and 
women. {^He glances involuntarily at her gaiters^ 
Oh, we always visit in our skirts, of course. 

MiNCHIN. 

Yes, yes, yes. 



24 THE AMAZONS. 

WiLHELMINA. 

Well — you'll never guess ! — Tommy had an 
offer of marriage. 

MiNCHIN. 

[Laughing.'] Ho, ho ! 

WiLHELMINA. 

Hush ! You'll fall off. 

MiNCHIN. 

That tom-boy too ! Now, if such a thing had 
happened to you I — 

WiLHELMINA. 

Mr. Minchin ! 

MiNCHIN. 

Eh 

WiLHELMINA. 

It did happen to me also. [_Looking round.'] 
Mother ! [Lady Castlejordan reappears.'] I'm in 
the way, I expect. 

Minchin. 

[Still laughing. "] No, no. 

WiLHELMINA. 

My fly, please. Thank you. 

\_She takes the fly from him ; the hook runs 
into his finger. 



THE AMAZONS. 25 

MiNCHIN. 

[ Yemng:\ Yah ! 

WiLHELMINA. 

You're hooked ! {^Extracting the hook."] I am sorry. 

\_She gathers her tackle together and goes to 
the gate. 

Lady Castlejordan. 

\To MiNCHiN.] I heard your laugh a long way 
off. What amuses you ? 

MiNCHIN. 

\In pain.'] Got a hook in my finger. 

Lady Castlejordan. 
How good humoured you are ! 

WiLHELMINA. 

Here's Tommy ! [^Calling.'] Tom ! Holloa — a — a ! 

[The call is returned and Lady Thomasin Beltur- 
BET, a bright^ rosy, rather rough-ma?inered girl of 
eighteen, appears and leaps the gate. She is in 
man^s ridi?tg-dress, smartly and perfectly turned- 
out from cap to boots. 

WiLHELMINA. 

Mr. Minchin has called to see us. 

Thomasin. 
{^Shaking hands heartily with Minchin.] Good 



26 THE AMAZONS. 

man ! How are you ? \^Kis5ing Lady Castlejor- 
DAN.] Missed you at breakfast, mater. [Zb Min- 
CHiN.] How's the old horse ? 

MiNCHIN. 

\Shaking his head.'] Ah ! 

Thomasin. 

I thought he went rather gingerly on that near 
fore of his when you rode over in the summer. Look 
here, you come and have a spin with me round the 
park one morning ; we'll give you a mount. What 
d'ye say ? 

MiNCHIN. 

[Looking her up and down.] My young friend, I'm 
afraid I could not ride with you while you are in 
such an attire as I now see you in — 

Lady Castlejordan. 

{Interposing.] Er — Mr. Minchin. Tommy, talk 
to your brother. 

{TnoMA^s,!!^ Joins Wilhelmina, and they talk 
together. 

MiNCHIN. 

\_Advancing to Lady Castlejordan, speaking in an 
undertone.] Lady Castlejordan, I — 1 must say it — 
I am a little shocked. 

Lady Castlejordan. 
I don't understand you. 



THE AMAZONS. 27 

MiNCHIN. 

Pardon me, is that a proper dress for a young 
woman to scamper about in ? 

Lady Castlejordan. 

It is all a question of environment. The poor 
African in her solitary row of beads is as discreet as 
the best dressed woman in town. I will not have 
my boys' unconsciousness disturbed. 

MiNCHIN. 

I ought to tell you this. I hear that the Overcote 
and Scrumleigh people spend the afternoons of their 
early-closing Wednesdays in hanging about the 
skirts of your park. 

Lady Castlejordan. 
Vulgar curiosity ! 

MiNCHIN. 

There, I wonder your park has skirts ! 

Lady Castlejordan. 

I have built five lodges round Overcote Park, 
expressly to protect us from intruders ; with the 
exception of one privileged old friend — yourself — 
no one enters the park but on my fortnightly Thurs- 
days. 

MiNCHIN. 

[Glancing over his shoulder?^ And then — ? 



28 THE AMAZONS, 

Lady Castlejordan. 

Then my boys disguise themselves in petticoats. 
I think I may boast that no boys have sweeter 
frocks than my boys. 

[WiLHELMiNA and Thomasin stroll away. 

MiNCHIN. 

\_Seeing that he is alone with Lady Castlejordan.] 
H'm ! one word more, Lady Castlejordan. Assum- 
ing, just for the sake of argument, that your boys 
are girls, may I ask w^hat you'd do if they should 
ever be asked in marriage ? 

Lady Castlejordan. 
{^Agitated.'] Ah ! Oh, my dear Mr. Minchin ! 

MiNCHIN. 

[Triumphantly.'] Aha ! 

Lady Castlejordan. 

Do you know you've chanced on a supposition 
that has been a reality ! While Willy and Tommy 
— well, Wilhelmina and Thomasin — were staying 
at Drumdurris Castle, two men fell in love with 
them ! 

Minchin. 

And in the name of common-sense, why not } 

Lady Castlejordan. 

Men I call them ! Insects ! Merciful Powers, 
one was a Frenchman ! 



THE AMAZONS, 29 

MiNCHIN. 

Well — ! 

Lady Castlejordan. 
A creature who has doubtless shot a fox ! 

MiNCHIN. 

The other? 

Lady Castlejordan. 
Little Lord Tweenwayes. 

MiNCHIN. 

Tweenwayes ! A fine race, the Fitzbrays. 

Lady Castlejordan. 
Fine ! 

MiNCHIN. 

Why Godefroy de Fitz Braye was one of Rich- 
ard's Knights in the Crusade. 

Lady Castlejordan. 

No Fitzbray has ever stood higher than five feet 
five in his boots. They're a shrivelled, puny line. 
The present Lord Tweenwayes inherits the accu- 
mulated ailments of all his ancestors, and he pre- 
sumes — ! 

Thomasin and Wilhelmina re-appear, 

MiNCHIN. 

Ssh! 



30 THE AMAZONS. 

Lady Castlejordan. 

\To MiNCHiN.] Walk up to the Hall with me ; 
we shall just be in time to greet Lord Noel. I'll 
tell you about this business as we stroll along. 
My dear boys, don't come with us ; it's so long 
since I've seen Mr. Minchin. 

[MiNCHiN opens the gate. 

WiLHELMINA. 

Very well, mother dear. 

Thomasin. 
All right, mater. 

Lady Castlejordan. 

\_As she and Minchin walk away.] Isn't that 
Scrumleigh church chime? We shall be late. 

[Minchin and Lady Castlejordan disap- 
pear. Thomasin sits on the tree-stump, 

Thomasin. 
So you think that, do you, Billy ? 

WiLHELMINA. 

Sure of it. 

Thomasin. 

But why should the parson concern himself about 
us ? 

WiLHELMINA. 

He — he — thinks we're girls, you know, Tommy 
dear. 



THE AMAZONS, 31 

Thomasin. 
Well, we ain't, my dear William, so he's out of it. 

WiLHELMINA. 

\_Approaching Thomasin and kneeling beside heri] 
Tom, don't you ever feel like a girl ? 

Thomasin. 
I ! Well, I should hope not. 

WiLHELMINA. 

But how do you know you don't ? I'm sometimes 
afraid / do. 

Thomasin. 

That's cos' you had measles too late in life and 
got your blood thin. You're a manly young chap 
enough, considerin'. 

WiLHELMINA. 

Ami? 

Thomasin. 

Of course you're not to be compared with old 
Noel. He is the pick of our basket. 

WiLHELMINA. 

Yes, he's very nice. 

Thomasin. 

Nice ! What silly words you use ! Why, he^s the 
best all-round sportsman our side of the county, even 



32 THE AMAZONS. 

I own that. Nice ! And he's a fellow that reads 
books too — / never could open a book. Nice ! He 
— he — well he's just my notion of what a young 
Englishman ought to be. Hullo ! What's that in 
the hollow of that tree ? 

WiLHELMINA. 

[^Quickly goifig across to the tree."] Oh, can you 
see it ? 

Thomasin. 
See it? 

WiLHELMINA. 

It must have slipped down ; it's my guitar. 

[Drawing a guitar-case from the hollow of the 
tree. 

Thomasin. 

What the dooce — ! 

WiLHELMINA. 

Mother heard me playing in my room and stopped 
me. She says it's girlish. 

Thomasin. 

Rubbish ! The Troubadours always played guitars. 
Oh, I say, ain't I well-informed } 

WiLHELMINA. 

\^Taktng the guitar from its case.'] So I hid it here 
thinking I'd creep down to the Tangle sometimes 
and sing to myself. 



THE AMAZONS. 33 

Thomasin. 

Hard lines! Won't the mater let you play any- 
thing ? 

WiLHELMINA. 

[Tuning the guitar.'] She's promised to give me 
a cornet. 

Thomasin. 

Good business ! Tune up, William. Anything 
pretty — bar love-rot, you know. 

WiLHELMINA. 

Ah, it's so damp ! 

\As WiLHELMINA is about to sing^ Thomasin 
raises herself suddenly. 

Thomasin. 

Look out ! Who's coming } 

[WiLHELMINA hastily conceals the guitar and 
case below the tree. Lady Noeline Bel- 
TURBET and Shuter are seen going to- 
wards the gate. Noeline is a handsome, 
imperious girl of twenty ; she wears the 
ordinary travelling costume of a young 
lady. Shuter is a good-looking woman 
of about thirty, suggesting by her manner 
and dress aft association with the army. 
Noeline has a set, serious look on her face. 
Shuter carries a travelling bag. 

WiLHELMINA. 

Noel 



34 THE AMAZONS, 

Thomasin. 
\ Jumping up. "^ Noel! 

Noel. 
Boys! 

[WiLHELMiNA and Thomasin gtip Noel- 
ine's hands in ma^ily fashion, 

NoELINEo 

How are you ? 

Thomasin. 
How are you ? 

WiLHELMINA. 

How are you ? 

NOELINE. 

How's the mother ? 

Thomasin. 
She was here just now with Mr. Minchin 

WiLHELMINA. 

They've gone up to the Hall, to meet you, I 
expect. 

NOELINE. 

I got out of the carriage at the East Lodge for 
the sake of a walk across the park. Sergeant ! 

Shuter. 
Yes, m'lord. 



THE AMAZONS. 35 

NOELINfi. 

Go on ahead. Tell my mother where I am. 
Don't stare at me like that, please. 

Shuter. 
All right, m'lord. \^She goes off through the gate, 

WiLHELMINA. 

What is the Sergeant staring at ? {^Looking into 

NOELINE's/^r^.] Oh ! 

Thomasin. 

{^Looking at Noeline.] By Jove, you don't look 
very fit ! 

Noeline. 
[Impatiently^ Nonsense ! 

Thomasin. 
Glad to get back ? 

Noeline. 

\_Putting her hands on their shoulder 5, '\ Glad ! 
Rather ! 

Thomasin. 
Good man ! 

Noeline. 

[ Wearily r\ Let's sit down. Perhaps I am rather 
out of condition. London isn't Scotland. 

[Thomasin hands Noeline a cigarette case, 
from which she takes a cigarette, passing 
on the case to Wilhelmina. 



36 THE AMAZONS. 

WiLHELMINA. 

\Taking a cigarette.'] Thanks ! 

\_They light their cigarettes. 

Thomasin. 

You'll find these something good; I'm giving a 
new firm a leg-up. 

NOELINE. 

Boys, I had your letters. So you got into a little 
difficulty at Drumdurris ? 

Thomasin. 
Tweenwayes. 

NOELINE. 

Proposed, didn't he ? 

Thomasin. 
I should think he did ! 

NOELINE. 

Nuisance, eh? 

Thomasin. 

Horrid bore. Enough to turn any fellow against 
his holidays. 

Noeline. 
What about you, Willy ? 

Wilhelmina. 

[Turning away slightly.'] A friend of Lord Tween- 
wayes. 



THE AMAZONS. 37 

Thomasin. 

Andr^ de Grival. You know, the usual thing— 
plenty of moustache and vivacity. 

NOELINE. 

Proposed ? 

WiLHELMINA. 

\In a low voice. ~\ Oh, yes. 

Thomasin. 

\Strtitting about.'] They behaved decently, I will 
say ; they did go to Lady Drumdurris first, and 
Egidia in a great commotion wrote off to the mater. 

WiLHELMINA. 

[Sitting on the tree-stump beside Noeline.] But 
they couldn't wait for mother's reply. 

Noeline. 
Caddish. 

WiLHELMINA. 

Perhaps Monsieur de Grival is ignorant of our 

customs. 

Noeline. 
Tweenwayes isn't. 

WiLHELMINA. 

[^Putting her arm round Noeline's 'waist?\ You're 
vexed. It wasn't our fault. [Kissing Noeline y^^tr- 
tively.'] You know, Tommy looked rather pretty up 
North. 



38 THE AMAZONS, 

NOELINE. 

\Looking into Wilhelmina's/^^^.] I dare say. 

[NOELINE kisses WiLHELMINA. 

WiLHELMINA. 

\_Taking Noeline's hand.~\ Ah ! \Looki7ig at Noel- 
TH^^s hand, suddenly.'] Oh! Where's your ring ? 

NOELINE. 

\_Snatching her hand away and concealing it.] What ? 

WiLHELMINA. 

Your ring — the Belturbet ring ! 

NOELINE. 

\_Agitated.'] It's in my case. 

WiLHELMINA. 

Noeline ! You know mother believes it never 
leaves your linger ! 

[Thomasin takes up the guitar^ and sounds the 
strings. 

NOELINE, 

{Startled?^ What's that ? 

WiLHELMINA. 

My guitar. 



THE AMAZONS 39 

NOELINE. 

Sing to me, Willy — the train always upsets my 
nerves. Then we'll all walk home together. 

[WiLHELMiNA ttikes the guitar and, leanijig 
agamst the hollow tree, sings a pretty mel- 
ody. Thomasin sits on the gate. Noel- 
INE remains on the tree-stump; as the 
song nears its close she sinks to the ground 
and, leaning her head on the stump, utters 
hysterical sounds. Wilhelmina, drop- 
ping her guitar, runs with Thomasin to 
Noeline. 

NOELINE. 

Oh 1 Ha, ha, ha, ha ! Oh dear, oh dear ! 

Thomasin. 
\_Raising her."] Here ! Hold up, old man 

Wilhelmina. 
Noel ! dear Noel ! 

Noeline. 
Oh, boys, boys, boys, I'm so upset. 

Thomasin. 
What's amiss ? 

Wilhelmina. 
Do tell us I 



40 THE AMAZONS. 

NOELINE. 

Wait a second. I will tell you — I must tell 
somebody. 

\^She walks up and down, composing herself. 
The others stand together and look on 
wonderingly. 

Thomas. 

\To WiLHELMINA.] Ell ! 

WiLHELMINA. 

\_To Thomasin.] I can't think — 

NOELINE. 

I'm all right. I say, you fellows, I got into a bit 
of a mess the night before last — a scrape, a bother. 

Thomasin. 
Did you ? 

WiLHELMINA. 

Oh! 

Thomasin. 
How? 

NOELINE. 

You know, Mrs. Vipont and her husband went 
down into Surrrey, to a political meeting he was to 
speak at, and as they couldn't catch the last train 
home they slept at Sir Henry Carholt's at Chilmere. 
I didn't go, for two reasons. Never-ending politics 
bore me, and then I — I wanted to profit by their 
absence to see London. 



THE AMAZONS, 41 

Thomasin. 
See London ! 

WiLHELMINA. 

Why, you have been seeing London for the last 
five weeks. 

NOELINE. 

Oh, yes, in my petticoats ; shopping with Florence 
in the morning, the forlorn park in the afternoon, a 
cockney Exhibition in the evening. I wanted to 
view London from the same stand-point from which 
we've been brought up to see things here at Over- 
cote. 

Thomasin. 

Good man ! 

NOELINE. 

Yes, that's it ! I felt that if I could only parade 
the streets, as a man, at the hour when all the nam- 
by-pamby women of our class are being escorted 
here or there, lifted in and out of carriages, wrapped 
about in soft cloaks, half smothered by polite atten- 
tions — if I could only do this I should indeed be a 
man ! I wanted to swagger along unnoticed, to fling 
away my half-burnt cigarette, to see it caught up still 
sparkling by a ragged urchin, to throw a coin to a 
crossing-sweeper, to be shoved and elbowed by a 
noisy crowd, ah, to be even sworn at — boys, I felt 
that if I could only do this I should be less like a 
girl than ever ! 

Thomasin. 



Oh, why wasn't I with you ! 



42 THE AMAZONS. 

WiLHELMINA. 

And — and did you do it ? 

NOELINE. 

\After a little pause^ gloomily.'] Yes, I did it. 
\Sitting on the camp-stool.] I did it. 

Thomasin. 
[Sittings gleefully.] Oh, ho, ho ! 

WiLHELMINA. 

[Kneeling beside Noel.] You hadn't your dress 
clothes in town with you, Noel. 

NOELINE. 

No, but I was obliged to make a confidante of 
Dawkins, the woman who valeted me in Chesham 
Street, and she and I raked out a dress-suit of 
Bobby Vipont's. Bobby's in Switzerland, you know. 
He's seventeen and just my height, but everything 
I borrowed of him, except his white necktie, was a 
beastly fit. However, I was well hidden by his 
Inverness cape, so it didn't matter a row of pins. 
Then I crammed my hair under a wig that had been 
left over from Lucy Vipont's birthday theatricals, 
and then — then Dawkins let me out. 

Thomasin. 

[Stamping her feet.] What did you do ? Where 
did you go to ? 



THE AMAZONS. 43 

NOELINE. 

[IVean'fy.] I did the West End. I — I didn't 
like it. I — I didn't care for anything I saw. I 
was tired — I was returning home. Then I got into 
this mess. 

WiLHELMINA. 

\_Tremblingly.'] Oh, dear. 

NOELINE. 

I saw a man about to hit a girl. He'd got his arm 
back, his fist against his shoulder — he meant it. 
So did I ! Boys, you know what I can do ! Well, 
before you could have said " Jinks ! " I'd slipped my 
big ring into Bobby Vipont's trouser pocket and I'd 
landed the monster — \_putting her fist under Wil- 
helmina's chhi\ just here, Willy dear. 

[Thomasin y/^;«/i" up excitedly. 

WiLHELMINA. 

Noel 

NOELINE. 

I've often knocked out Sergeant Shuter in the 
same way, but always with the gloves on. \_Rubbing 
her hand with aversion?^ Oh, you don't know what 
it's like to get home on a strange man's chin without 
the gloves on ! 

Thomasin. 

Did he go down ? 

NOELINE. 

Down ! \Nodding and' staring at the ground in 
agitation^ I see him there constantly. I tumble 



44 THE AMAZONS. 

over him in my sleep. \_Going to Thomasin.] Oh, 
Tommy, Tommy ! 

Thomasin. 
Go on ! don't stop. 

NOELINE. 

There was a crowd — men and women grew out 
of the pavement — 

WiLHELMINA. 

Brutes ! 

NOELINE, 

No, they were friendly. They called me "guv- 
nor." "Let him have it again, guv'nor," one per- 
son advised. An awful, unanimous desire seemed 
to possess them all to mind what they called my 
togs. My hat — Bobby Vipont's hat — went in a 
twinkling. Then terrible hands, hundreds of hands, 
I fancied, of all shapes and sizes, were laid on my 
cape. I wrenched myself free and broke away, 
hitting about like a woman then, right and left. 
And I ran. I ran till I fainted. 

WiLHELMINA. 

You fainted ! You ! 

NOELINE. 

Why, don't men faint sometimes 

Thomasin. 
What became of you ? 

NOELINE. 

When I came to I was lying on a sofa in a strange 



THE AMAZONS. 45 

room and a young fellow was sitting, a little way off, 
watching me. 

WiLHELMINA. 

Noel ! 

Thomasin. 
Noel! 

NOELINE. 

\Awkwardly^ Well ? 

Thomasin. 
Well ? llmpatiently.'] Well ? 

NOELINE. 

I'd fallen almost into his arms, he explained. 
He'd taken me to his lodgings to get me round. 
He spoke as a gentleman speaks. He — he liked 
the look of me, he said. 

Thomasin. 

[^Biting her lips!] How did he convey you to his 
rooms ? [NoELiNE shakes her head.] Were you on 
a level with the street ? 

NOELINE. 

No, first floor. 

Thomasin. 
How did he get you upstairs ? 

NOELINE. 

\Rocking herself to and fro.'] That's just it ! 



46 THE AMAZONS. 

Thomasin. 

[Frowning.'] Think he guessed you — weren't the 
— usual sort of young man ? 

NOELINE. 

I don't know what to think. 

[WiLHELMiNA bursts iuto tears. 

Thomasin. 

[Hitting her boots with her crop^ angrily!] By 
Jove, this isn't a very nice accident to befall a 
young lady! 

NOELINE. 

[Looking uj>.] Tom ! 

Thomasin. 

Yes, you were sent to town as a young lady. [In- 
dignantly!] A fellow's sister, too ! Well, well, well ? 

NOELINE. 

He lent me a cap, expecting me, I suppose, to ask 
his name, but I snatched the cap from him and bolted 
down his stairs into the street. The dawn was just 
breaking when I found a cab. Dawkins put me to 
bed in a rage. When I got up I burnt the cap and 
gave Dawkins two pounds and a cigarette-holder. 
[ Wringing her hands.] Oh ! Oh ! [Wilhelmina 
sobs. 

Thomasin. 

You shut up, William ! [To Noeline, gloomily.'] 
After all, beyond the indignity and the humiliation 



THE AMAZONS. 47 

of the thing, you're none the worse for the little out- 
ing— 

NOELINE. 

{Holding out her hand?^ My ring ! the Belturbet 
ring! 

Thomasin. 
Eh! 

NOELINE. 

The big ring that has never left a Belturbet's 
hand for so many hundreds of years ! 

Thomasin. 
Not gone 

NOELINE. 

It must have fallen out of the pocket of Bobby 
Vipont's silly trousers. 

Thomasin. 

Jupiter ! The mater's angry only about once a 
year ; this'll be it I Look out ! here they are ! 

[WiLHELMiNA hastily co?iceals the guitar afid 
its case i?i the hollow of the tree. Noeline 
draws on her gloves. Lady Castlejor- 
dan, Minchin, afid Shuter come through 
the gate. 

Lady Castlejordan. 

{^Embracing Noeline.] My dear boy ! [Looking 
into NoELiNE's/^<r^, uneasily^ Ah, London has taken 
that fine bronze tint out of your face. There's Mr. 
Minchin. [Calling.'^ Shuter ! [Shuter advances. 



48 THE AMAZONS. 

NOELINE. 

\Taking a letter from her pocket^ Mrs. Vipont 
asked me to give you that, mother. 

\_She hands Lady Castlejordan the note, 
and joins Minchin, Wilhelmina, anii 
Thomasin. 

Lady Castlejordan. 
\To Shuter, while opening the note."] Sergeant ! 

Shuter. 

Yes, m'lady. 

Lady Castlejordan. 

Certainly, I do notice it. Lord Noel looks terrp 
bly flabby. 

Shuter. 

I shall see what he does with the bar-bells to-night 
in the gymnasium. 

Lady Castlejordan. 

{^Reading the note to herself. '\ Oh ! " Dear Miriam. 
Please come to town at once to hear a statement 
from Clara Dawkins, my maid. Say nothing yet to 
NoeHne as we may find the woman untruthful. 
Yours affectionately, Florence Vipont." Mercy I 
what has occurred ? \calli7ig'\ Mr. Minchin ! [Min- 
chin approaches and Shuter retires. The girls gather 
together.'] Old friend, will you take me to London 
this morning ? 

Minchin. 

I? 



THE AMAZONS. 49 

Lady Castlejordan. 

I must be protected from annoyance at Great 
Overcote and Scrumleigh. If you won't — 

MiNCHIN. 

But I will ! 

Lady Castlejordan. 

Oh, thank you ! Not a word ! 

\^She goes hurriedly away through the gate. 

MiNCHIN. 

Lady Castlejordan — ! 

\_He follows her. Shuter goes after them. 

Thomasin. 
\Going to the gate."] Anything wrong, Sergeant ? 

Shuter. 

[Closing the gate.'] Hope not, m'lord. 

[Shuter disappears, 

Thomasin. 

Why is the mater so taken up with Mr. Minchin 
to-day ? 

NOELINE. 

It gives one breathing-time, at any rate. Come, 
boys, we'll go down to the bridge till lunch. Billy, 
bring the banjo. 

[Wilhelmina produces the guitar again. 



50 THE AMAZONS, 

Thomasin. 

Yes, let's forget for a little while that you've lost 
Dad's ring. By Jove, it's rippin' to be all together 
again, aint it ! 

NOELINE. 

Ah, Tom, I wish we hadn't left home this summer 
any of us ! 

Thomasin. 

\_Slapping her on the back.'] Cheer up, old man ! 

NOELINE. 

IRallying.l I mean to. After lunch we'll have 
a pop at the partridges. Confound London ! Hate- 
ful London ! 

[NoELiNE and Thomasin go off below the 
hedge. 

Wilhelmina. 

[Running after them with the guitar."] Wait for 
me, you fellows ! Wait for me ! 

[After a few moments^ Andre de Grival 
emerges cautiously from the bush and un- 
dergrowth on the left below the hedge. 
De Grival is a good-looking^ animated 
you?ig Frenchman of the type of a Grevin 
caricature. He speaks fluently^ but his 
pronunciation and inflections are, like his 
appearance and general demeanour, very 
French. Pieces of twig and bracken cling 
to his clothes and his necktie is disarranged. 



THE AMAZONS. 51 

De Grival. 

\L00ki71g about /izm.] Where have we got to ? 
Where is it ? [Wiping his brow.'] I am hot. [Calliiig 
in an uftdertone.'] Tweenwayes, my dear fellow ! 
Tweenwayes ! [The Earl of Tweenwayes crawls 
out of the thicket, on his stotnach, painfully.'] Tween- 
wayes, my friend, here we are sheltered. We may 
stand upright. 

[Lord Tweenwayes rises. He is a short, 
thin, weak-looking ma?t of about three-and- 
thirty, with a pale, emaciated face and red 
eyes. Although a most insignificant per- 
son, his bearifig is full of affectation and 
his tone a haughty one. He is more 
disarra7iged and dishevelled than his com- 
paction, his clothes are covered with bracken, 
his hat and pocket are full af leaves, his 
knickerbockers are green and soiled at the 
knees and, at one knee, there is a small rent, 

Tweenwayes. 
You don't think we've been observed ? 

De Grival. 

Impossible. We crawl like alligators. Allow me. 
[Picking the brackefi from Tweenwayes' clothes and 
otherwise putting him in order.] That was a good 
place at which to enter the park, between two lodges, 
not in sight of each. There you are. 

Tweenwayes. 
Thank you ; let me render you a similar service. 



52 THE AMAZONS. 

De Grival. 

[Turning his back to Tweenwayes.] My friend ! 
[TwEENWAYES fasHdiously removes one piece 
of bracken from De Grival's coat. 

Tweenwayes. 

Yes, I certainly did discover the one weak spot 
in the fortification. 

De Grival. 

\_Removing the bracken from the front of his coat^ 
Pardon me, /found it. 

Tweenwayes. 
[Politely, but annoyed.'] I found it. 

De Grival. 
No, no, I found it. 

Tweenwayes. 

\_Icily.'] I dare say you're right. 

[He replaces the piece of bracken on De Gri- 
val's coat and moves away. 

De Grival. 

Thank you. At all events, we are here. To 
fancy I am once more near Wilhelmina, breathing 
the air she breathes, listening to the birds that sing 
to her, looking at — ! [To Tweenwayes, who is 
sitting, emptying his pockets of leaves.] My friend, 
you have scratched your nose. 



THE AMAZONS. 53 

TWEENWAYES. 

No ! {^Applying his handkerchief?^ Yes, it is so. 
Hah, this is characteristic of us ! We have never 
hesitated to shed our blood freely for those on whom 
we have bestowed our affection. 

De Grival. 
We — us ? You and me ? 

TwEENWAYES. 

No, no, no — my race, my family. We have 
always been remarkable for our ardent passions. 
Our loves have made history, you know. 

De Grival. 

Lady Castle Jordan's objection to you as a suitor 
for Lady Thomasin, have you heard it ? 

Tweenwayes. 

Heard it ! She objects to my stature, my whole 
physical fabric, in fact. She is crazy on the subject 
of muscular development. 

De Grival. 

[Feeling his muscles and hitting the air.'\ Yes, yes. 
Ah ! ah ! [^Kicking vigorously ?\ Ah ! 

Tweenwayes. 

\_Regarding De Grival disdainfully.'] We — we 
have never been coarse, brawny men ; always deli- 
cate, fragile, with transparent veins. Our women 



54 THE AMAZONS. 

are especially interesting. An eminent surgeon 
once assured me that he could make out the osteo- 
logical structure of any one of our women by placing 
her before a lighted candle and looking at her on 
the dark side. We — 

De Grival. 

And I am rejected because I am a Frenchman 1 
Ah! 

TWEENWAYES. 

Well, frankly, with families who have made his- 
tory, I can quite understand that that — but why 
pain you ? 

De Grival. 

But I am English ! 

Tweenwayes. 
My dear De Grival ! 

De Grival. 

English to my back-bone ! French by birth, yes. 
But so long educated in England, English in my 
appearance, manner, voice. I play your games, 
follow your sport. I speak the idiom of your lan- 
guage ; I say " don'cher know ! " frequently. I learn 
your proverbs — "a great many cooks spoil your 
broth, honesty is the best thing to do, a stick in 
time — " all of them, by heart. I say " damitall " 
in the smoking-room. And still I am French ! 
Bah! 



THE AMAZONS, 55 

TWEENWAYES. 

All I can say is I've known you some time and — 
well, we are judges of men. 

De Grival. 
My friend ! And we stick together in this affair ? 

TWEENWAYES. 

I will not leave this neighbourhood till I have 
personally renewed my proposal to Lady Thomasin. 
I am pleased to have your companionship. 

De Grival. 

But do we understand each other ? For example, 
if one of us was asked up to the Hall, that one 
would not march in and leave the other, his friend, 
on the outside ? 

TWEENWAYES. 

Speaking for myself, if I — well, dined at Over- 
cote Hall without you, I should certainly make 
quite a point of alluding to you generously during 
the evening. 

De Grival. 

\^Enraged.'\ Alluding ! Thank you very much ! 
Bah! Never reckon your ducks — your chickens! 
\_Snapping his fingers in Tweenwayes'/^^^.] Don'cher 
know ! 

TwEENWAYES. 

Monsieur de Grival I 



56 THE AMAZONS, 

De Grival. 
[ Walking away,] La, la, la ! 

TWEENWAYES. 

\Indignantly?^ Oh ! 

\They walk about angf^ily, then meet again. 
After a display of irresolution, Tween- 
WAYES removes a piece of the bracken from 
De Grival's coat. 

De Grival. 
[Turning, conciliated.'] Ah ! my friend ! 

Tweenwayes. 
[Suddenly, in evident pain. ] Oh ! Oh, dear me ! 

De Grival. 
Tweenwayes, you have it again ! 

Tweenwayes. 
[ Writhing.] No, no, the other was sciatica ; this 
is cramp. 

De Grival. 
Cramp ! 

Tweenwayes. 

We have cramp. We have sciatica also, but every 
alternate generation has the cramp bias very clearly 
defined. Oh, dear, dear ! 

De Grival. 
This from creeping through the underwood. What 
to do? 



THE AMAZONS, 57 

TWEENWAYES. 

It will pass. 

De Grival. 

I suffer with you. 

TwEENWAYES. 

\_Rocking himself to and fro.'] Our cramp has 
made history. My mother quotes an old distich — 
" Cold the wind and damp the day, 
Cramp shall seize the true Fitzbray ! " 

Lord Litterly appears, above the hedge, and, seeing 
TwEENWAYES and De Grival, he looks cau- 
tiously over the gate. He is a handsome young 
man with the frame of an athlete and an air of 
indolence. 

Litterly. 

[To himself] I — I'll swear to that back ! [Aloud!] 
I say! 

De Grival. 

\_Turning.'\ Eh.? \_Going to the gate.'] My dear 
Barrington ! 

Litterly. 

[ Opening the gate. ] Andre ! 

[ They shake hands ; Tweenwayes groans, 

Litterly. 
\To De Grival.] Who's your pal ? 

Tweenwayes. 
\Looking round.] How do you do, Litterly ? 



58 THE AMAZONS. 

LiTTERLY. 

Why, Tweeny! what are you making that noise 
for? 

De Grival. 
The cramps. 

LiTTERLY. 

\Producing a little silver flask from his waistcoat 
pocket?^ Cramp! Take a pull. [Tweenwayes 
drinks. '\ Why, we three haven't met since Lady 
Twombley's jolly dance that hot night in July. I 
say, what's this place ? 

De Grival. 
Overcote Park. 

LiTTERLY. 

No ! Then it's my aunt's place ! 

Tweenwayes. 
Certainly it is. 

De Grival. 
Lady Castlejordan — your aunt ? Ah, I see it 1 

LiTTERLY. 

The eccentric Lady Castlejordan they call her, 
poor lady. Are you visiting ? [Tweenwayes and 
De Grival exchange looks.'] What's up ? 

De Grival. 

Pardon me if I speak to Tweenwayes. 

[De Grival and Tweenwayes consult to- 
gether. 



THE AMAZONS. 59 

LiTTERLY. 

\To himself?^ I say, suppose the young man I 
picked up — I mean, the young woman I picked up 
— turns out to be my — \ivith a prolonged whistle] 
Phew ! I say ! 

De Grival. 

\_To LiTTERLY.] No, we are not visiting. Are 
you ? 

LiTTERLY. 

I ! My people and the Overcote Park people 
have been daggers-drawn for years. 

TWEENWAYES. 

You will, I am convinced, thank me, Litterly, for 
letting you know that no one is permitted to enter 
this park except on Lady Castlejordan's reception 
days. 

LiTTERLY. 

[^Sitting lazily.'] So I believe. My cousins are 
rather uncommon in their rigs out, I've heard. 

TWEENWAYES. 

Yes, yes, but — but here you are, my dear 
Litterly ! 

LiTTERLY. 

And here you are, my dear Tweeny. 

TwEENWAYES. 

Er — excuse me. 

[De Grival and Tweenwayes again con- 
sult. LiTTERLY makes a cigarette calmly. 



6o THE AMAZONS, 

De Grival. 

My dear Barrington, we admit we have no rights 
here. The short of it is, we desire to meet Lady 
Wilhelmina Belturbet — 

TWEENWAYES. 

And Lady Thomasin — 

De Grival. 

Ladies we have had the joy of knowing at Drum- 
durris. 

Litterly. 

I say ! Is that it ? 

De Grival. 

To-day we discover the only way to enter this 
park without notice. 

Litterly. 

You think so.? Well, no one saw me wriggle 
through a break in the fence, I swear. 

De Grival. 
Ah ! We came through the fence also 

Litterly. 

My dear aunt ought to have the park palings 
looked to. 

De Grival. 

[Pointing to the /<?/?.] Over there. 



THE AMAZONS, 6i 

LiTTERLY. 

{Pointing to the right.^ Over there. 

TWEENWAYES. 

\_Angrily.'] Pish ! 

De Grival. 
Pardon me. 

[TwEENWAYES a?td De Grival again con- 
sult; LiTTERLY chuckles. 

TWEENWAYES. 

My dear Litterly, it is our deliberate intention to 
conceal ourselves in Overcote Park until we en- 
counter these ladies. I need hardly tell you that 
any assistance you can render us, in the shape of 
leaving us to ourselves, we shall esteem highly. 

LiTTERLY. 

[^Sitting on the grass, leaning lazily against the tree- 
stump.'] I say, I was about to make a similar sug- 
gestion to you, old chap. I'm going to hang about 
here too. 

TWEENWAYES. 

May I ask — ? 

LiTTERLY. 

Why not ? I'm a little interested in a lady I've 
just seen entering the park. I've followed her from 
town, in point of fact, in the hope of getting a few 
words with her on the quiet. So you see. Tweeny, 
you can't have the field quite to yourself. 

[TwEENWAYES a?id De Grival consult to- 
gether with great animation. 



62 THE AMAZONS. 

TWEENWAYES. 

I resent this ! I resent it ! 

De Grival. 
Damitall ! 

TWEENWAYES. 

We — we don't brook obstacles. 

De Grival. 
A great many cooks ! Damitall ! 

Tweenwayes. 

If this had occurred a few centuries ago we 
should have simply slain the fellow ! [ After fur- 
ther muttered conversation they return to Litterly.] 
My dear Barrington, it seems to us that as we are 
all trespassers here, and as our interests run on 
somewhat parallel lines, the best course we can 
adopt is to — is to — 

De Grival. 
Stick together. 

Litterly. 

Pals ? I say, just as you like — don't put your- 
selves out. 

De Grival. 

Good ! this is good ! Union is strength ! Don' 
cher know ! 

\Fro7n the distance there comes the sound of 
the girW voices^ singing to the accompani- 
ment of the guitar^ and gradually drawing 
near. 



THE AMAZONS, 63 

TWEENWAYES. 

Hark! 

De Grival. 

Hark! 

TwEENWAYES. 

It's coming here. We'd better get out of sight. 

De Grival. 

Certainly. \To Litterly.] Harrington, you will 
be looked at ! [De Grival goes off quickly, 

Tweenwayes. 
Litterly! Litterly! 

Litterly. 

{^Preparing to rise,'] All right, old chap, I'm mov- 
ing along. 

Tweenwayes. 

Upon my word, Lord Litterly! [Going down 
upon his hands and knees and crawling into the thicket^ 
scowling at Litterly.] Fool 1 fool I \^He disappears, 

Litterly. 

\Rising slowly and listening^ Girls' voices. Girls. 
\He walks off after De Grival. Then Noel- 
ine, Wilhelmina, a}id Thomasin come 
along singing. 

Thomasin. 

\_Near the gate, speaking to Wilhelmina.] Look 
out, Billy ! Here's the Sergeant. 



WiLHELMINA. 

Thomasin. 



64 THE AMAZONS. 

\They cease singmg. Wilhelmina hur- 
riedly returns the guitar to its hiding place, 
Thomasin stands shieldi?ig Wilhelmina 
as Shuter approaches, 

Shuter. 

[From the other side of the gate.] My lady would 
like to see you up at the Hall directly ; she wants to 
say good-bye. 

NOELINE. 

Good-bye ? 

Good-bye ? 

Good-bye ? 

Shuter. 

M'lady's just off to town. 

NOELINE. 

To town ? 

Thomasin. 

What for? 

Wilhelmina. 

Going to London ? 

Noeline. 

Mother has been sent for by the the lawyers, per- 
haps. 

Wilhelmina. 

She's going to see the dentist, very likely. 



THE AMAZONS. 6$ 

Thomasin. 

Hairdresser, / think. Mater's hair is coming out 
in sackfulls. 

WiLHELMINA. 

Dressmaker, I believe. 

Thomasin. 

Or bootmaker ; mater hasn't got a decent shoe to 
her back — I mean — 

NOELINE. 

Don't stand here guessing. Come on, boys. 

[Shuter opens the gate, Thomasin shoulders 
the campstool; Wilhelmina picks up her 
rod and basket. The th?'ee girls disappear^ 
and Shuter follows. Then De Grival 
returns excitedly. 

De Grival. 

\To his companions^ Ssst ! Ssst ! [Tweenwayes 
crawls from out the thicket. Litterly re-e?tters leis- 
urely.'] Wilhelmina ! I have seen Wilhelmina ! 

Tweenwayes. 
Hush! Thomasin ! I have heard Thomasin ! 

Litterly. 

[^To himself?^ My cousin ! The boy I picked up 
— well, the girl I picked up — my cousin ! 

De Grival. 
\^To Tweenwayes.] Did you hear ? Lady Castle- 



66 THE AMAZONS. 

Jordan goes to London ! Do you understand 
that? 

TWEENWAYES. 

Dash it, do you think I'm obtuse ? 

De Grival. 

What fortune ! The mother goes ! We see them, 
talk with them, walk with them ! La, la, la ! Love 
laughs at blacksmiths ! Don' cher know ! 

\_He dances about fantastically. Litterly 
sits thoughtfully. The girls are heard 
singing again, their voices gradually be- 
coming more distant. 

De Grival. 

\^Rushing to the gate.'] Again ! 

[Litterly rises on hearing the singings and 
running to the gate, climbs on to the 
middle bar and looks off. 

TwEENWAYES. 

You'll be seen by the maid ! [Going do7vn on his 

hands and knees and crawling to the gate.'] Fool ! fool ! 

[ He puts his head under the lower bar 1o 

watch the girls. The girls a7'e still singing 

in the distance. 

END OF THE FIRST ACT. 



THE AMAZONS. 67 



THE SECOND ACT. 

The scene is the same as in the preceding Act. 
FiTTON, the gamekeeper^ an old man^ is sitting and 
smoking a clay pipe while a dog lies near him. 

Thomasin. 
[Calling in the distance.'] Fitton ! Fitton ! 

FiTTON. 

\_Rising and putting his pipe away.] 'Ere I be, 
m'lord. 

[Jle opens the gate. Thomasin enters, followed shortly 
by WiLHELMiNA, and, after a brief interval, by 
NoELiNE. The three girls are in clothes fashioned 
after the style of a man's shooting suit, corduroy 
coats and waist- coats, tweed knickerbockers, shoes 
and gaiters, everything very smart aud natty. 
They carry their guns. 

Thomasin. 
Kept you waiting, Fitton ? 



68 THE AMAZONS, 

FiTTON. 

Not you, m'lord. 

WiLHELMINA. 

Good afternoon, Jo. 

FiTTON. 

Afternoon, m'lord. 

NOELINE. 

Well, Jo, how are you ? 

FiTTON. 

Glad to see ye back agin, m'lord. 

Thomasin. 
What's the programme ? 

FiTTON. 

\^To Noel.] I thought we'd try the plantations 
furst, m'lord. 

NOELINE. 

That'll do. Get us back to tea — what time, 
Billy? 

WiLHELMINA. 

Youatt will be here with the tea-basket at a 
quarter to four. 

FiTTON. 

We'll work up toward Silverthorn Coppice arter 
tea; birds be feedin' theer about sunset. 



THE AMAZONS. 69 

NOELINE. 

Get along, boys. 

[Thomasin, Wilhelmina, and Noeline go 
off below the hedge ^ Yyiio^ following with 
the dog. After a pause, De Grival comes 
hastily behi?id the hedge, and clambers over 
the gate. 

De Grival. 

\CaUing.'\ Tweenwayes ! my friend ! 

[Tweenwayes runs up, attempts to climb the 
gate, falls over, and is caught by De 
Grival. 

Tweenwayes. 
\Sitting, much agitated?^ Confound the thing ! 

De Grival. 

[^Looking over the gate, then joining Tweenwayes.] 
They have stopped running. 

Tweenwayes. 

An ancestor of mine, Ughtred Fitz Bray, called 
"the Uncomely," brought inevitable destruction — 
so the legend goes — on those whom he cursed in 
anger. Curse these cows ! 

De Grival. 

First we come face to face with the deer — we 
leave them. Then we come face to face with the 
bulls — we leave them. Then — 



^o THE AMAZONS, 

TWEENWAYES. 

Oh, it's a beastly park ! This is the only decent 
bit of retirement. 

De Grivau 

[ Walking about impatiently.'] But here we do not 
meet the ladies, here we shall never meet the ladies. 

TwEENWAYES. 

Pardon me, if the ladies are out they must come 
here to get away from the cows. 

De Grival. 

One thing we may congratulate ourselves. We 
have lost Barrington. 

TwEENWAYES. 

Ah, yes, we're rid of Litterly. \_Pacing up and 
down angrily,"] We soon tired him out. 

De Grival. 

I am glad. Two are company, three is too much. 
Don' cher know ! 

TwEENWAYES. 

His society had already become intolerable to me. 
The boundless self-sufficiency of the man ! Once, 
when he trod on my foot, J was within an ace of 
cursing him. I doubt his breeding, too. The idea 
of his tracking a pretty face from town in this way ! 
The circumstance of his turning out to be the lady's 
cousin doesn't excuse him ; I believe he simply met 
her in a shop and followed her about like a snobby 



THE AMAZONS. 71 

cad. It's an accursed impropriety. Heavens, is 
chivalry extinct ! What — eh ? 

De Grival. 

[ With a little groan.'] Tweenwayes, my friend, I 
am hungry. 

Tweenwayes. 
Hungry ! I feel like a disused vault. 

De Grival. 
Bah ! It is an hour past my lunch. 

Tweenwayes. 

You forget, you did breakfast, I didn't. I may tell 
you, we — we never breakfast. 

De Grival. 
[Turning away.'] We, we, we ! 

Tweenwayes. 

If we rniss our midday meal we have acute sinking 
of the stomach. My aunt quotes a quaint old 
quatrain — 

" In the battle, let the strongest, 
" Who the bold Fitzbrays would scatter, 
"Seek out those who've been the longest 
" Parted from their cup and platter." 

We — 

De Grival. 
My friend, I am tired of your we — we ! 



72 THE AMAZONS. 

TWEENWAYES. 

Monsieur de Grival ! 

De Grival. 
La, la, la ! 

TwEENWAYES. 

{Furiously^ Leave the park, leave the park ! 

De Grival. 

[Facing Tweenwayes excitedly.'] Possession is 
nine points of your law! 

Tweenwayes. 
You forget yourself ! 

De Grival. 

First come, first serve ! [Contemptuously waving 
his hand under Tweenwayes' noseI\ Don' cher 
know. 

Tweenwayes. 
Ahl 

\They separate and walk about ^ then they 
stand apart eyeing each other furtively. 

De Grival. 

[Advancing to Tweenwayes hesitatingly. "] Pardon 
me. 

Tweenwayes. 

[To himself, struggling inwardly^ Can I .? 

[Tweenwayes at length offers De Grival 
two fingers. 



THE AMAZONS, 73 

De Grival. 
\I)ubiously^ My friend ! 

[LiTTERLY strolls alo?ig, below the hedge ^ 
smoking, Tweenwayes and De Grival 
exchange looks of disgust. 

LiTTERLY. 

l^Sitting.J Seen anybody ? 

De Grival. 

Not we. What have you been doing, my dear 
Barrington ? 

LiTTERLY. 

Having a bit of lunch. 

Tweenwayes. 
\_Advandng eagerly."] Where, where, where ? 

LiTTERLY. 

[^Pointing over his shoulder.] Found a most de- 
lightful rural inn close by — "The Checkers," at 
Little Overcote. I say, if you two would like to 
patronise it, I'll keep watch here for the ladies 
willingly. 

Tweenwayes. 

Accept my thanks, but I prefer not to quit my 
post. We — we never — 

De Grival. 

Nor I too. I will not leave the park till I have 
seen Wilhelmina. 



74 THE AMAZONS. 

LiTTERLY. 

All right ; you please yourselve 

[TwEENWAYES and De Grival walk about 
aimlessly, 

Tweenwayes. 
\After apauseJ] What did they give you to eat? 

LiTTERLY. 

Grilled bacon — 

Tweenwayes and De Grival. 
Oh! 

[They go off quickly, below the hedge, Tween- 
wayes dropping on to his hands and knees 
and disappearing into the thicket. 

LiTTERLY. 

\_Chuckling^ Ha, ha, ha ! Ten pounds to a 
button they follow that path to the left instead of 
crossing the brook. I say ! Keep to the right, you 
fellows — ! 

\_IIe goes after De Grival. Directly he has 
disappeared, Noeline enters, below the 
hedge, leaning on Thomasin's arm. 

Thomasin. 
How did you manage to come such a cropper ? 

Noeline. 
Put my foot in a rabbit-hole. 



THE AMAZONS. 75 

Thomasin. 
What's your ankle like now ? 

NOELINE. 

Better. But my wrist — I can't hold my gun. 

\She sits on the tree-stump, 

Thomasin. 

[^Placing her gun against the tree.'] Poor old 
man ! 

NOELINE. 

\_IIolding her wrist.'] Don't mind me; go after 
Billy and Fitton. 

Thomasin. 
ShaVt. 

NOELINE. 

I'll pick you up in a few minutes. \^Moving her 
hand.] It's easier already. 

[There is the sound of a shot in the distance, 

NOELINE. 

That's Billy's gun. 

Thomasin. 

\To herself.] Oh, the sneak ! 

[Thomasin runs off unnoticed by Noeline. 
LiTTERLY reappears. 



76 THE AMAZONS. 

LiTTERLY. 

\^Seeing Noeline and speaking to himself. "l My 
boy — my girl — my cousin ! 

\He rustles the fallen leaves with his stick, 

Noeline. 

[ Without turning. '\ Oh, do go ! I promise to 
join you in five minutes. 

LiTTERLY. 

[^Approaching her. '\ Eh ? 

Noeline. 
\_Rtsing, with a gasp, and facing him.'] Sir ! 

LiTTERLY. 

You — you weren't speaking to me ? 

Noeline. 
I — I — I don't know you. 

LiTTERLY. 

My name is Litterly — Lord Litterly. 

Noeline. 
[Staring at him wildly.] You — Lord Litterly ! 

Litterly. 
You must be one of the Ladies Belturbet. Lady — ? 



THE AMAZONS. jy 

NOELINE. 

Noeline. 

LiTTERLY. 

I say, we're related. 

Noeline. 

\Nodding^ still unable to remove her eyes from him.'\ 
Yes. 

LiTTERLY. 

There's no love lost between your branch of the 
family and mine. I suppose we don't shake hands 1 

Noeline. 
Certainly not. 

LiTTERLY. 

No. I thought I'd raise the point. 

Noeline. 

[Pulling herself together.'] I — I am sorry to have 
to tell you — you are trespassing here. 

LiTTERLY. 

Yes, yes, I suppose I am. [Strolling up to the gate,] 
I say, pretty park. Pardon me — my bootlace. 

life puts his foot on the bar of the gate and ties 
his bootlace. 

Noeline. 

\To her self y clenching her hands?] How can he have 
found out I am the young fellow he carried home to 



78 THE AMAZONS. 

his lodgings. The cad, to take advantage of it like 
this! My cousin too! The cad ! Oh! {^Taking up 
her gun as if to go, then turning to Litterly, haughtily?^ 
I don't assume that you are ignorant of the way in 
which my mother has trained her children. 

Litterly. 
No, no, don't assume I'm ignorant. 

NOELINE. 

Nor do I think it worth while to defend — and to 
you ! — the lives we live here. I must say, however, 
that I can see only one possible disadvantage at- 
tached to our mode of existence. 

Litterly. 

Tailor's bills ? 

Noeline. 

\_Going.'\ I mean the necessity for regarding unin- 
vited guests as unmannerly intruders. 

Litterly. 

Lady Noeline ! Do stay a moment. I fagged down 
here thinking I was perhaps going to render some- 
body a trifling service. 

Noeline. 
A service ? 

Litterly. 
Just sit down a minute. Now do ! \_Looking about!] 



THE AMAZONS. 7^ 

Take a — [^Pointing to the tree-stump.'] Take a stump. 
Do! 

^After a momeiifs irresolution^ she returns and 
sits^ dejia7itly nursing her gun, 

LiTTERLY. 

\_Standing near her.] Thanks. This is how it 
comes about — 

NOELINE. 

Do you mind going further off ? 

LiTTERLY. 

Not a bit. [Zoohing round.'\ Ah, the ottoman ! 

\He sits on the gate. During the scene which 
follows he watches her closely but playfully^ 
telling his story with great relish. She lis- 
tens intently^ with her back turned to him. 

NOELINE. 

\To herself, after glancing at him.'] The — utter — 
cad ! 

LiTTERLY. 

Lady Noeline, this is my little story. The night 
before last, as I was walking home from my club, a 
young gentleman, who had evidently got himself into 
some bother, ran straight into my arms and, having 
arrived there, stayed there. The poor young chap 
had fainted. 

Noeline. 
Well — ? 



8o THE AMAZONS. 

LiTTERLY. 

I was puzzled what the dooce to do. He seemed 
a nice young fellow. I say, what would you have 
done ? 

NOELINE. 

I — I really don't know. 

LiTTERLY. 

I'll tell you what I did in the end. There was no 
one about ; I couldn't drop him into the mud or hand 
him over to the police — could I ? 

NOELINE. 

Oh, no, you couldn't have done that I 

LiTTERLY. 

No. I hailed a cab and took him off to my lodg- 
ings. He did seem such a nice young fellow. 

NOELINE. 

[ Writhing, ] Will you please go on with your story, 
if you must tell it me ? 

LiTTERLY. 

Certainly. Where was 1 1 Oh yes — he did seem 
such a nice young fellow. 

NOELINE. 

I don't want to hear what sort of a young fellow he 
appeared to be ! 



THE AMAZONS. 8i 

LiTTERLY. 

No, no, it doesn't really belong to the story. Well, 
I took him home and carefully deposited him on the 
sofa. 

NOELINE. 

\To herself.] Cad ! 

LiTTERLY. 

He was a good-looking Johnnie. 

NOELINE. 

Lord Litterly ! — 

LiTTERLY. 

I beg pardon — that's nothing to do with it. By- 
and-bye he came round. But I didn't succeed in 
making much of him. I fancied he was oif his head, 
which reminded me that he'd lost his topper. So I 
offered to lend him a cap. I say, you should have 
seen the way he grabbed at it ! Then he bolted 
down my stairs and, in point of fact, hooked it. 
\_Getting off the gate.'] Now this is the story — it was 
a new cap. He hadn't even said thanks for the loan 
of it, and that riled me. So down I went after him 
and followed his cab to a house in Chesham Street. 
Ha, ha ! What d'ye think of that ? 

NOELINE. 

I — I fail to see the smallest necessity for you to 
— to have followed this — person about. 



82 THE AMAZONS. 

LiTTERLY. 

It was a brand-new cap. 

NOELINE. 

You might have known it would be returned — 
\To herself ^ recollecting^ Oh! 

LiTTERLY. 

Well, I did follow him, and there it is. Now, not- 
withstanding his bad form, he still struck me as 
being a nice young fellow. 

NOELINE. 

\Rising^ I can«^/ — 

LiTTERLY. 

Yes, now I think of it, that does belong to the story. 
\_Looking at her fixedly.'] He seemed such a nice 
young fellow that, somehow, I couldn't drive him 
out of my head, and next day I found myself hang- 
ing about that house in Chesham Street hesitating 
whether I'd go and bang away at his door. 

NOELINE. 

[ With her eyes averted^ What for ? 

LiTTERLY. 

\^Still watching her intently^ What for ? Well — 
there was the cap. 

NOELINE. 

A paltry cap ! 



THE AMAZONS. 83 

LiTTERLY. 

A new paltry cap. However, I didn't knock — 
I'm such a slow man. But early this morning I was 
in Chesham Street again and, while I was lolling 
against a lamppost, out you came with another lady, 
and got into a luggage-brougham. I say, it was 
an awful job, chasing that brougham to Paddington 
station — 

NOELINE. 

The idea of your doing such a thing ! What an 
intolerable liberty ! \_She goes indignantly up to the 
gate^ where she stands with her back to him.l The 
mere idea of it ! Oh ! 

LiTTERLY. 

\^To himself, watching her admiringly ^^^ I say, 
she's glorious ! And to think that I carried that up 
seven-and-twenty stairs ! She hates me for it — but 
I've counted 'em ! [ To her.] Lady Noeline, there's 
a look in your shoulders that tells me you'd like me 
to explain why I followed you. [She quickly changes 
her positioji, still averting her face. '\ The fact is I saw 
a strong likeness in you to that Johnnie, the sort of 
likeness a big sister might bear to a cub of a 
brother. And I fell an uncontrollable desire to 
have a jaw with you. [Leaning against the trunk of 
the tree.'] You know I didn't find out till an hour 
ago that we're cousins. 

Noeline. 

[Eyeing him furtively.] However marked the re- 
semblance may be between me and the individual 



84 THE AMAZONS. 

you picked up, you will find it difficult to justify 
your pursuing a woman in this way. Wanting "a 
jaw " doesn't quite do it ! 

LiTTERLY. 

\_Seriously7\^ Lady Noeline, I thought if I could 
get five minutes' chat with the girl who bears such 
a strong resemblance to that nice young fellow, I 
could advise her to keep an eye on — shall we call 
him her brother ? — in future. I thought I might, 
through her, save that nice young chap from some 
day falling into another difficulty when perhaps 
there would be no me to pick him up carefully and 
take him out of harm's way. I thought perhaps I 
might convince him, through her, that the West 
End of London — the Worst End of London — at 
night-time is not a locality where even a self-re- 
specting cat may trust himself. And this, Lady 
Noeline, is how I come to trespass in Overcote 
Park. 

Noeline. 

\^To herself^ in a low voice ?\ He's not — such a caa. 
It's positively delicate of him to avoid referring to 
me point-blank. He can't be an out-and-out cad. 
\^To LiTTERLY, her tone slightly altered?^ I — I un- 
derstand now the service you wished to render and 
I — I — I quite appreciate your intentions. 

LiTTERLY. 

There' s one other small matter ; [ taking a ring 
from his waistcoat pockef] that Johnnie left his ring 
on my hearthrug. 



THE AMAZONS. 85 

NOELINE. 

Eh ? Oh ! 

LiTTERLY. 

[Examining the ring."] Rummy old thing it seems 
to be. 

[^They stand together for a time not speakings 
he handling the rifig, amused, she eagerly 
but irresolutely eyeing it. Then he offers it 
to her silently and she slips it hastily into 
her pocket. 

NOELINE. 

\Putting her gun under her arm."] You — you have 
taken a great deal of trouble — 

LiTTERLY. 

Pooh ! not worth talking about. 

NOELINE. 

Er — er — good afternoon. \_As she is going she 
meets Fitton, and says to him.'] Oh ! you've come 
back for me, I suppose ? 

Fitton. 

[Eyeing Litterly and speaking to Noeline.] Beg 
pardon, m'lord ; for interruptin' — 

[Litterly strolls away, 

Noeline. 

Er — Fitton, this is my cousin, Lord Litterly. A 
— a sort of accident has brought him into the 
park — 



86 THE AMAZON'S. 

FiTTON. 

Accidents will appen, m'lord. 

NOELINE. 

My mother would be extremely angry if she knew. 
Jo, I don't think it's necessary to tell her about it. 
[Impatiently^ Oh, come on ! 

FlTTON. 

{^Detaining /lerJ] M'lord it beaint no good goin' 
arter t'others. 

NOELINE. 

What do you mean ? 

FiTTON. 

Lord William and Lord Thomas and me worked 
round from plantations to Hexly Bottom, and just 
as we was all pickin' our way 'cross th' brook, darn 
me if we didn't fall over two other gentlemen ! 

NOELINE. 

Jo! 

FiTTON. 

{Rubbing his head.'] Odd rabbit it if we get an- 
other shot this arternoon ! 

NOELINE. 

Why, where are Lord Willy and Lord Tommy ? 

FiTTON. 

Walkin' about wi' 'un, talkin' to 'un — 



THE AMAZONS. 87 

NOELINE. 

[Going to LiTTERLY a7id speaking hotly ^ Do you 
know anything of this ? The keeper says there are 
two men in the park with my brothers — my sisters ! 

LiTTERLY. 

Lord '"weenwayes and Andre de Grival. 

NOELINE. 

Oh! 

LiTTERLY. 

They're with me — I'm with them — we're with 
each other. 

NOELINE. 

[^Facing him indignant ly."] You — you — you are 
precisely what I first thought you ! \^She runs off. 

LiTTERLY. 

{^Following her,] No, I'm not! Lady Noeline, 
what is it you thought me ? I say — ! 

[Disappears after her, 

FiTTON. 

[Calling after them.] You won't find 'em theer, I 
tell 'ee ! They be away by Hexly Bottom. \_2urm?ig 
away.'] Oh, dang it I Boys will be boys, they do 
say — lord, seems to me boys will be gels here in 
Overcote Park ! 

[WiLHELMiNA enters below hedge^ followed by 
De Grival. 



88 THE AMAZONS. 

WlLHELMINi^. 

\^To FiTTON, in a frightened tone ^ Jo, have you 
seen Lord Noel ? 

FiTTON. 

{Pointing off.'l He's gone arter ye, m'lord, wi' 
another gentleman — Lord Latterby or some sich. 

WiLHELMINA. 

[72? De Grival.] Lord Litterly is with Noel. 
\_Partly to her self. '\ Then Noel can't be so very 
angry with me and Tommy. \_Taking Fitton aside^ 
Fitton — 

[WiLHELMINA gives instructiofis to Fitton. 
Thomasin enters from above the hedge 
followed by Tweenwayes. 

Thomasin. 

{Leaning on the gate,] Billy, Lord Tweenwayes 
and Monsieur De Grival will take tea with us, of 
course. Don't forget, extra cups and saucers to 
come down from the house ! 

WiLHELMINA. 

I am ordering them now. [Stamping her foot.~\ 
You're making me do everything ! 

Thomasin. 

[7^7 Tweenwayes.] Come on, Tweenwayes. You 
must see our new Hereford bulls. [She goes off. 



THE AMAZONS. 89 

TWEENWAYES. 

\_JIesifating at the gate — to himself^ She will take 
me to the cattle ! [7^^ De Grival.] Get away frcm 
here as soon as you can — I'm coming back. 

De Grival. 

My friend, you must find some other place to 
make your love in — I want it. 

Thomasin. 
\In the distance.~\ Tweenwayes ! 

TWEENWAYES. 

Oh ! [Going — and saying to himself as he looks at 
De Grival indignantly.^ Insolent ! Insolent ! 

\_He follows Thomasin. 

FiTTON. 

\_To Wilhelmina.] Don't 'ee be afeared, m'lord. 
I'll make it all right wi' Youatt. [ To himself] You- 
att don't get no more game out o'me for his sister 
in Lunnon if he can't keep his mouth shut. 

[FiTTON disappears ; Wilhelmina sits on the 
tree-stumpy and De Grival comes down 
and kneels by her side. 

Wilhelmina. 
Monsieur de Grival ! 

De Grival. 
[ With great fervour?^ Wilhelmina ! Ah, you are 



90 THE AMAZONS. 

adorable ! You are enchanting ! You are perfect ! 
Oh, you are — you are — you are pretty good ! 

WiLHELMINA. 

[ With her handkerchief to her eyes.^ Oh, it isn't 
kind of you to be so persistent ! 

De Grival. 

Faint heart never won a fair-haired young lady ! 
Don' cher know ! 

WiLHELMINA. 

But nothing, nothing would ever reconcile my 
mother to your nationality. 

[She shifts her gun from one knee to another ; 
the muzzle chancing to point towards De 
Grival. 

De Grival. 

My nationality ! Absurd trifle ! [Disconcerted by 
the presence of the gun. ~\ French by birth, yes. But 
English in my appearance — English in my — [Ris- 
i^S^ going behind y^\\.YiYAjyi\^k^ and kneeling on her 
left.'] French by birth, yes. But English in my 
appearance, manner, voice. Do I not play your 
games, your golf, your cricket ? — no, not your 
cricket! Do I not speak your proverbs — "Set a 
thief to catch himself " — all of them > Do I not 
say " Damitall " in the smoking-room — ? 

WiLHELMINA. 

Oh! 



THE AMAZONS. 91 

De Grival. 
No, I do not ! 

WiLHELMINA. 

You don't fully realise the extent of my mother's 
prejudice. According to her notion, a Frenchman 
can never be a thorough sportsman — 

De Grival. 

How wrong the notion ! For example, let her 
once see me riding in the paper-chase. In the 
paper-chase, nine out of ten, I am always — always 
— in at the decease. I — 

WiLHELMINA. 

I assure you that would weigh very lightly with 
my mother. \_Inadverte71tly she again shifts her gun 
so that it points at De Grival's face?^ Oh, please, 
please give up hoping, Monsieur de Grival ! 

De Grival. 

\Again uncomfortable. '\ Give up hoping ! Give 
up — do you imagine — it is not poss — ! \Rising^ 
he takes the gun from Wilhelmina a?id places it 
against the opposite tree.'\ Pardon me. Never play 
with edged guns. 

[Tweenwayes enters quickly^ followed by Thomasin. 
TwEENWAYES opcfis the gate to let Thomasin 
through^ theft closes it sharply and looks off. 

Thomasin. 

{^Coming down to Wilhelmina.] Tweenwayes 
has been admiring our Herefords. 



92 THE AMAZONS, 

De Grival. 
{^Knowingly. '\ Has -^^^ Ha, ha ! I laugh ! 

TWEENWAYES. 

\_Eyetng De Grival witheringly.~\ I should 
much like Monsieur de Grival to examine the 
Hereford bulls. 

De Grival. 

[Startled.] Ah ! 

Tweenwayes. 
Perhaps Lady Wilhelmina ! 

Wilhelmina. 

[Going up to the gate.] With pleasure. Mon- 
sieur de Grival — ? 

De Grival. 

[Uncomfortably ?[ You honour me. [Tween- 
wayes opens the gate ; Wilhelmina passes through. 
De Grival follows^ then returns for the gun, saying 
to himself. ] In case. Prevention is better than 
being run after. [To Tweenwayes, insultingly in 
passing him.] Don' cher know ! 

Tweenwayes. 

[Falling back.] Ah! [Wilhelmina ^<?^j ^/^Z- 
lowed by De Grival, then Tweenwayes climbs on to 
the gate, looki?ig after them.] Insolent ! May they 
toss him like a common coin ! Insolent ! 

[He Joins Thomasin who is sitting on the 
stump, lighting a cigarette. 



THE AMAZONS. 93 

Thomasin. 
\_Offering him her cigarette case.'\ Smoke ? 

TWEENWAYES. 

Thank you, no. We Fitzbrays do not smoke. 

Thomasin. 
How a man can exist without it puzzles me. 

Tweenwayes. 
We drink. 

Thomasin. 
No ! What, too much ? 

Tweenwayes. 

Alternate generations have the drink bias very 
clearly defined. 

Thomasin. 
Where do you come in ? 

Tweenwayes. 

The predilection skips me. My father was called 
"Three-bottle Tweenwayes." But, in one way and 
another, he made a good deal of history in his 
time. 

Thomasin. 

It must be a bad business to be a tippling 
Tweenwayes. 



94 THE AMAZONS. 

TWEENWAYES. 

[ Walking away a little annoyed?)^ Pardon me, we 
don't think so. 

Thomasin. 

{^Following him."] I say, Tweenwayes, I'm still 
thinking over what you've told me about this fellow, 
Litterly, following my brother Noel from town and 
intruding himself here — 

Tweenwayes. 

Pray dismiss that topic for the moment. [For- 
mally.'] Lady Thomasin, for third time — I love 
you. 

Thomasin. 

Oh, shut up, Tweeny ! 

Tweenwayes. 
We — we are always listened to. 

Thomasin. 

{^Stamping her foot.'] Oh ! 

[She goes to the gate and leans upon it^ with 
her back towards him. 

Tweenwayes. 

[Walking to and fro.] Lady Thomasin, it would 
be an easy task to descant on your beauty, your 
amiability. But, when I express my conviction that 
my family would regard our engagement with fa- 



THE AMAZONS. 95 

vour, it seems to me I say everything. Heavens, 
what a test to apply to a woman, and yet you 
emerge from the ordeal unscathed ! The Fitzbray 
legend runs — \To himself ?[ Dash it ! how does it 
run — ? 

Thomasin. 

{^To herself?^ Of course, Tweeny's right — the 
fellow must have been simply attracted by Noel's 
face. Confound him ! 



TWEENWAYES. 

I've got it — 

" Search the south and sweep the north, 
Scour the east and spoil the west, 
Speed your emissaries forth 
To the fairest and the best. 
Storm the cities' topmost heights. 
Steal about the country side — 
When ev'ry grace in one unites 
You will have found a Fitzbray's bride ! ** 

Thomasin. 

\To herself. '\ The mater's often told us that those 
other Belturbets are outsiders — 1 

TwEENWAYES. 

^Resuming his march.'] On the subject of my 
claims upon your esteem my own mouth is necessa- 
rily closed. But there's a sentence in a letter I re- 
ceived yesterday from my sister, Lady Clandunphie 



96 THE AMAZONS, 

[searching for a letu/'\ which perhaps — you — ought, 
to — [finding it ] Ah ! 

[He produces a letter^ and a large reading- 
glass in a case. 

Thomasin. 

[Eyeing the reading-glass?^ Hullo, what's that 
machine ? 

TWEENWAYES. 

We have no sight to speak of. [Beading.'] "One 
thing, dearest Galfred, I would urge upon you, to 
guide you in your quest of a woman fitted to figure 
with you in history's page, and that is the constant 
reflection that you preserve in your own person all 
that is noblest and best of the mediaeval spirit." 
[Advancing to Thomasin.] Lady Thomasin — 

Thomasin. 

Look here, old man, we're delighted to see you 
here to tea while the mater's away, to show you 
the Herefords and all that — but drop the rest. 
Even if I were inclined to turn myself into a girl, 
which I ain't, the mater wouldn't hear of anybody 
but a man with a chest that 'ud take you the best 
part of the afternoon to drive round. 

TWEENWAYES. 

[Putting away the letter and glass.] Can it be pos- 
sible ! However, we have never hesitated at self- 
sacrifice. If you could suggest any easy means of 
muscular development — 



THE AMAZONS. 97 

Thomasin. 

By Jove ! Tweeny, if you did want to show what 
you're made of — ! 

TWEENWAYES. 

Made of ? 

Thomasin. 

This fellow Litterly — our cousin — who sneaks 
into our park after a pretty face ! You could do it, 
if you liked ! 

TWEENWAYES. 

Do what ? 

Thomasin. 
You know a lot of bad language, naturally .? 

TwEENWAYES. 

My grandfather M^as called Round-oath Reginald I 
His swearing made history. 

Thomasin. 

I know some too, only the mater bars that. Well, 
when you come across Litterly again, you use yours, 
will you ? 

T WE EN WAVES. 

\Apprehensively?[ To Litterly t 

Thomasin. 

Certainly, tell him what we all think of his con- 
duct ! 



98 THE AMAZONS. 

TWEENWAYES. 

I — I should have little hesitation — er — in — 

Thomasin. 
Good man ! [Running across to the right~\ Hullo ! 

TwEENWAYES. 

Eh ? Eh ? 

Thomasin. 

Here he is — with Noel. [Tweenwayes hastily 
makes for the thicket.'] No, no, not that way — over 
here. 

Noeline and Litterly enter below the hedge talking. 
Litterly carries Noeline's gun which he ulti- 
mately places against the hollow tree. 

Noeline. 

\_Emharrassed at encountering Thomasin and 
Tweenwayes. J Er — Tommy — this is Lord Lit- 
terly. \To Litterly.] My brother — sister — 
Thomasin. 

[Litterly bows to Thomasin, who inclines her 
head stiffly and then turns her shoulder 
upon him. 

Thomasin. 

\To Noeline.] My friend, Lord Tweenwayes. 
[7i7 Tweenwayes.] My brother Noel. 

[Tweenwayes bows; Noeline returns his 
salute haughtily. 



THE AMAZONS. 99 

NOELINE. 

{Taking Thomasin aside. '\ Why do you treat Lord 
Litterly, a cousin, so very coolly ? 

Thomasin. 
\To NoELiNE.] How dare he come here I 

NOELINE. 

He chances to be the young man who was useful 
to me in London. 

Thomasin. 

Gracious ! The creature who dandled you like a 
baby! 

NOELINE. 

Be silent ! He has the good taste to gloss over 
that. Where's Willy? 

Thomasin. 
With Andre de Grival. 

NOELINE. 

You're behaving like blackguards, both of you. 
Fetch your brother at once. 

Thomasin. 

{Going through the gate ^1 Certainly. ^«r friends 
have tea with us, you may like to hear. 

Noeline. 
Oh, the idea of such a thing ! 



loo THE AMAZONS, 

Thomasin. 
Are you going to ask Litterly ? 

NOELINE. 

It would be a marked impoliteness not to do so. 

Thomasin. 
I thought as much ! 

NOELINE. 

I'll box your ears to-night ! 

Thomasin. 

Noel, if you domineer, when I get indoors I — I — 
I'll be perfectly uncontrollable. 

NOELINE. 

\Turning away.] Impudent fellow ! 

[Thomasin goes off. Tweenwayes advances 
towards Litterly, who is sitting on the 
root of the tree. 

Tweenwayes. 

{Finding he is alone with Litterly.] Er — Litterly 

— have you considered whether it is quite the act of 
a gentleman to — to — rove about a place where, for 
family reasons, it is obviously — ah — undesirable 

— eh? 

Litterly. 

My dear chap, I haven't thought at all about it. 
\_Glaring at Tweenwayes.] Have you 1 



THE AMAZONS. loi 



TWEENWAYES. 



\Mildly?^ No, / haven't. {^He tur?is and goes 
through the gate irresolutely looki?ig to the right.'] 
Herefords ! 

[lie quickly tur?is to the left., and disappears. 
NoELiNE and Litterly approach each 
other rather cofistrainedly. 

Litterly. 

[Looking at his watch.] I say, Lady Noeline, is 
the four forty-five a decent train ? 

Noeline. 
[Indifferently.] You return by it ? 

Litterly. 
Bound to ; I dine out to-night. 

Noeline. 
Then I won't press you to wait for tea. 

Litterly. 
Tea! 

Noeline. 
Tea comes down from the Hall directly. 

Litterly. 
Hang the train ! It's only a man's dinner. 



102 THE AMAZONS. 

NOELINE. 

{Coldly?^ You mustn't disappoint your friends. 
• Good-bye. \_He grips her hand tightly^ and she cries 
out.'\ Oh ! 

LiTTERLY. 

What? 

NOELINE. 

[Holding her wrist.'] I have a sprained wrist. 

LiTTERLY. 

[Taking her hand again.] I say, I am sorry! 
I'm afraid I — [Looking at a mark upon her wrist,] 
Hullo ! What's that ? 





NOELINE. 


Nothing. 






LiTTERLY. 


N. 






NOELINE. 


My initial. 






LiTTERLY. 


What's it doing 


there ? 



NOELINE. 

I am sure you'll lose your train. 

LiTTERLY. 

Who put it there ? 



THE AMAZONS. 103 

NOELINE. 

[^Impatiently.'] Oh, when we were quite small 
boys — Willy and Tommy and I — we used to tat- 
too each other on wet days. The nearest way to 
the station — 

LiTTERLY. 

[Looking at her wrist.] By Jove ! how did you 
manage it? 

NOELINE. 

Oh dear, oh dear ! If you must know, there's a 
scrubby little plant with a scarlet sap, growing here 
at Overcote, that does it. [ Walking about, looking 
upon the ground.] It's early for it, but I daresay I 
can find you a sprout. [Plucking a root.] Yes, 
this is it, I believe. [Breaking the stalk and showiiig 
it to him.] There ! You simply make punctures 
and paint them with the sap. [He takes a sprig and 
exa?nines it.] The nearest way to Scrumleigh sta- 
tion — 

LiTTERLY. 

[Looking at his wrist, then at her.] Would you 
mind carving something on me? 

NOELINE. 

I! [Drawing herself up.] Really 1 

LiTTERLY. 

I say, do ! I say — 

NOELINE. 

[Stamping her foot.] What a maddening trick 



I04 THE AMAZONS. 

you have of saying ^' I say " ! Forgive me for re- 
marking it. 

LiTTERLY. 

I know; it's a rotten habit. I say — {^Correcting 
himself. '\ I beg your pardon — I mean, if you'd 
write me just one little letter — 

NOELINE. 

Lord Litterly ! 

LiTTERLY. 

On my wrist — it would remind me to drop saying 
"I say." 

NOELINE. 

{Haughtily.'\ I fear the habit must remain un- 
checked. 

\She walks away and, with her back to him^ 
picks some more of the plant. 

Litterly. 

\To hifnself pulling the sprig to pieces I\ She hates 
me like poison — she hates me not — she — ! I've 
half a mind to pay her out for snubbing me like 
this. I could do it too, if I choose to tell her of 
that trifling little circumstance I kept back. Ha, 
ha, ha! Why shouldn't I.-* Ha, ha! She hates 
me like rats — she hates me not — [7i? Noeline.J 
Lady Noeline — 

NOELINE. 

\^Not turning?^ Yes? 



THE AMAZONS. 105 

LiTTERLY. 

I say, there's something on my conscience I 
should like to get rid of before I go. 

NOELINE. 

On your conscience ? 

LiTTERLY. 

Well, when I told you the tale of my picking-up 
that nice young fellow the night before last, I left 
out one little occurrence — 

NOELINE. 

You — left out — one little — occurrence ! 

LiTTERLY. 

It happened while his brain was wandering, just 
as we — but, very likely, you wouldn't think it 
belongs to the story. 

NOELINE. 

Perhaps you will give me the opportunity of 
judging. 

LiTTERLY. 

With pleasure — on one condition. 

NOELINE. 

What's that ? 

LiTTERLY. 

{^Tapping his wrist.'] That you'll write me that 
letter. 



io6 THE AMAZONS 

NOELINE. 

Certainly not. 

LiTTERLY. 

As a memorial of an awfully jolly adventure. 

NOELINE. 

And that would be the price of the omitted 
episode ? 

LiTTERLY. 

[Turning up his shirt cuff.'\ The reserved price. 

NOELINE. 

I wouldn't pay it to buy the whole county ! 

LiTTERLY. 

\Turning down his shirt cuff.'] Episode bought 
in. 

NOELINE. 

\_Fiercely.'] Oh ! ^^Irresolutely.] You have 
really something to tell.? 

LiTTERLY. 

Honour bright. 

NOELINE. 

I — I think your behaviour is infamous. {Draw- 
ing a long silver pin from her hair and approaching 
him.] You have no objection to this ? 



THE AMAZONS 107 

LiTTERLY. 

[Turning up his cuff again."] Delighted. 

\^She sits on the stump and he stands on her 
left extending his wrist, 

NOELINE. 

What letter? 

LiTTERLY. 

N will do. 

NOELINE. 

I prefer any other letter, please. 

LiTTERLY. 

Oh, N stands for lots of things. N's for nothing. 

NOELINE. 

\Angrily?[ Oh! [She makes \he punctures, 

LiTTERLY. 

[Sitting beside her.'\ You can't reach. 

NOELINE. 

[As she makes the punctures?] This — will be — a 
vile — N — I promise you. 

LiTTERLY. 

[ Wincing."] You must have been plucky kids to 
stand much of this. 



lo8 THE AMAZONS. 

NOELINE. 

\_Becomtng interested in her work.'\ We were — 
plucky kids — as you express it — Tommy especially. 

LiTTERLY. 

Tommy? 

NOELINE. 

I remember — it was on Tommy — I used to 
make — the most — elaborate designs. 

LiTTERLY. 

Poor Tommy ! and have those frescoes faded ? 

NOELINE. 

I think you are the most inquisitive person I have 
ever met. 

LiTTERLY. 

Sorry. 

NOELINE. 

No, I wish they would die out ; they occasion 
such serious inconvenience now. 

LiTTERLY. 

Do they — how ? 

NOELINE. 

Oh, really, if you will know everything, when 
Thomasin visits as a girl it is impossible for her to 
appear to advantage at dances or any low-necked 
function. [Sticking the hairpin in her eoat.] There ! 
[Rubbing the broken stalk of the plant upon his wrist.] 
I wish you joy of this N ! [2hej' rise. 



THE AMAZONS. 109 

NOELINE. 

[^Listening.'] I think the others are coming. 
What is it you left out of your story? Be quick, 
please ! 

LiTTERLY. 

\_Turning down his cuff. '\ I shouldn't have men- 
tioned it only I think a chap who's fond of his 
mother must have a lot of good in him, and so it's 
no more than just to that Johnnie — 

NOELINE. 

Fond of his mother ! Explain yourself ! 

LiTTERLY. 

Well, after I'd carried him up those seven-and- 
twenty stairs — 

NOELINE. 

[Clenching her hands ^^ Oh! Yes? 

LiTTERLY. 

After I'd carried him up those stairs I stopped for 
wind on the landing. And it was then that nice 
young fellow sighed and groaned and put his arm 
round my neck — 

NOELINE. 

He didn't ! 

LiTTERLY. 

And called me "mother" in a whisper. He 
didn't know what he was up to, of course, but it 
showed his good instincts. 



no THE AMAZONS, 

NOELINE. 

Any — anything more ? 

LiTTERLY. 

One thing more. I couldn't stop his doing it, 
you know ; my own arms were engaged. 

NOELINE. 

Stop his — doing what ? 

LiTTERLY. 

As he said " Good-night, mother," in a dreamy 
way, he kissed me. That's the incident. When's 
tea? 

NOELINE. 

Oh ! Oh ! 

\^She turns upon him fiercely^ deals him a sound- 
ing blow upon his ear, and walks away. 

LiTTERLY. 

\^Looking after her.] Does the invitation to tea 
still hold good? 

[WiLHELMiNA, De Grival, and Thomasin 
eome through the gate. 

WiLHELMINA. 

[ With De Grival timidly?^ Noel, may I introduce 
Monsieur de Grival ? 



THE AMAZONS. in 



De Grival. 



[Advancing to Noel gallantly.'] Lady Noeline, I 
am charmed to be here not asked. 

Thomasin. 

[Opening the gate.] The tea! [Calling.] Look 
sharp, Youatt ! Don't go to sleep, Fitton ! 

LiTTERLY is presented to Wilhelmina. Youatt 
and Fitton enter through the gate carrying a 
large square basket and some camp-stools. They 
open the basket and arrange the tea-thi7igs on the 
tree-stumpy Thomasin assisting^ while Litterly 
busies himself iii placing the camp-stools. After 
the tea is laid Youatt removes the basket and 
takes up apositioft by the gate. Fitton goes off. 

Thomasin. 

[To Youatt, while tea is being laid.'\ What's the 
matter with you, Youatt ? 

Youatt. 

[Waggiftg his head.] Oh, m'lord, what are we all 
a^ comin' too ! 

Thomasin. 
We're all a' comin' to tea directly. 

Youatt. 
Oh, the disgrace to the Park 

Thomasin. 
Youatt, if you ever breathe a word to a soul — I 



112 THE AMAZONS. 

YOUATT. 

Don't think it o' me, m'lord. 

LiTTERLY. 

[7^ Thomasin, who is carrying camp-stools^ I 
say, let me help. 

Thomasin. 
{^Glaring at him.'] Thanks, awfully. 

LiTTERLY. 

\^To himself.] The little 'un's no friend of mine. 

Thomasin. 
[72? herself.] Impudent interloper ! 

LiTTERLY. 

[To himself.'] Rude little mess of tattoo ! 

Thomasin. 

[Aloud.] Tea ! tea ! Come along, Noel ! Sit 
down, Willy ! There, you are. Monsieur de Grival ! 

[The girls sit upon the camp-stools., the men 
upon the ground — Noeline pouring out 
tea, with Litterly on her left; Thomasin 
is in the centre., with Wilhelmina and De 
Grival on her right. 

YoUATT. 

[To himself^ Ah, a sad stain on the Park I 



THE AMAZONS, 113 

LiTTERLY. 

\^To NoELiNE, wrapping his handkerchief round his 
wrist.'\ You observe I am stopping to tea ? 

NOELINE. 

\_To LiTTERLY, disdainfully.'] I can hardly avoid 
your doing so. Ah, please don't draw attention to 
your wrist in that way. 

LiTTERLY. 

\_Futting his handkerchief away."] I say, did my 
cousin Thomasin tingle like this when she was 
frescoed ? [ Wincing.'] Oh ! 

Thomasin. 
[Looking about.] Where's Tweenwayes ? 

LiTTERLY. 

Yes, Where's Tweeny ? 

De Grival. 
Where is my friend Tweenwayes ? 

Thomasin. 

\^CaIHng.'\ Lord Tweenwayes! Lord Tween- 
wayes ! 

LiTTERLY. 

^Calling loudly.] Halloa! Tweeny I 

De Grival. 
Tweenwayes ! 



114 THE AMAZONS, 

TWEENWAYES. 

\In the distance.'] Coming ! 

[He crawls out of the thicket. 

Thomasin. 
Tea! 

TWEENWAYES. 

\Sitting^ Thank you. 

[You ATT comes and hands the tecu 

Thomasin. 

[Quietly to Tweenwayes.] Tweeny, have you 
spoken your mind to Litterly yet ? 

Tweenwayes. 

I thought of waiting till I get him in town. We 
always deliberate before expressing our views. 

Thomasin. 

Well then, you must arrange with me exactly 
what you're going to say. Look here, will you and 
Andre de Grival come up to the Hall to-night, 
when it's dark, and have a quiet chat about it with 
Willy and me .? 

Tweenwayes. 

Come up to the Hall ! 

Thomasin. 
Not to the door, of course. You'll have to lower 



THE AMAZONS. 115 

yourselves through a skylight. I'll write you out 
instructions. 

[TwEENWAYES produces a letter^ tears off the 
half-sheet^ and gives it to Thomasin, who 
writes on it with pencil. There is the 
sound of the loosening of a string of WiL- 
helmina's guitar in the hollow of the tree, 

De Grival. 
[Starting up.'] Ah ! What ! 

WiLHELMINA. 

A String of my guitar ! 

De Grival. 

[^Taking the guitar-case from the tree.] Oh, you 
play, you sing ! 

WiLHELMINA. 

No, no ! 

De Grival. 

[^Taking the guitar from the case.] Lady Noeline, 
my dear Barrington, Tweenwayes — persuade ! 
\Ha7iding the guitar to Wilhelmina.] Don' cher 
know! 

LiTTERLY. 

Lady Wilhelmina ! 

Noeline. 
Do, Willy. 



I 



"6 THE AMAZONS, 

De Grival. 
[Entreatingly,'] Ah, if you like ! 

[WiLHELMiNA Strikes a chord, 

TWEENWAYES. 

\To himself^ writhing, '\ We loathe music. 

[WiLHELMiNA sifigs a simple song in two verses, 

LiTTERLY. 

\At the end of the first verse.] I say, charming ! 

De Grival. 
[In ecstasy."] Ah, bravo, bravo ! Pretty good ! 

Thomasin. 

[Quietly to Youatt, giving him the note she has 
written.] Take this to Monsieur de Grival. 

[Youatt gives the note /^ De Grival, who 
reads it. Wilhelmina sings the second 
verse of the song, and is applauded. 

Thomasin. 

[Quietly to Tween waves.] I've given Andre de 
Grival directions how to — how to call upon us. 

Tweenwayes. 
[Glaring at De Grival.] Why to him ? 

Thomasin. 
Don't you like him t 



THE AMAZONS. 117 

TWEENWAYES. 

We — we are accustomed to take the lead in such 
matters. 

NOELINE. 

\To everybody^ Any more tea? Lord Tween- 
wayes, Lord Litterly, Monsieur de Grival ? 

\The men decli?ie. Noeline rises ^ and t'hey 
all follow. Tweenwayes quietly disap- 
pears. Noeline and Litterly stand 
together. Fitton re-enters; he and 
YoUATT replace the tea-things i7i the 
basket^ fold the camp-stools and finally 
deposit them on the basket^ then Youatt 
goes off through the gate and Fitton 
goes away to the left. 

Litterly. 

\To Noeline.] Lady Noeline, permit me to 
thank you for a most delightful day. 

Noeline. 

Delightful ! You are still nursing your arm, I 
see. 

Litterly. 

\_Cheerfully.'] My arm is exceedingly painful — I 
wouldn't lose a throb of it. 

Noeline. 
I — I struck you, I'm afraid. 



Ii8 THE AMAZONS, 

LiTTERLY. 

There's a singing in my ear — but it's your voice. 

NOELINE. 

Perhaps I — I ought to apologise for losing my 
temper. Please forget it. 

LiTTERLY. 

No, don't deprive me even of the recollection of 
— your temper. 

WiLHELMINA. 

\To De Grival, 7vho is replacing the guitar in the 
tree.~\ Good-bye, Monsieur de Grival. 

Thomasin. 

\^To WiLHELMINA.] No, no. Hc's coming up to 
the Hall by-and-bye with Tweeny, to have a smoke 
and a chat with you and me. 

WiLHELMINA. 

\Horrified.'\ Tommy ! 

Noeline. 

Now boys ! Where are the guns ? 

\The guns are collected^ and Wilhelmina, 
Thomasin, and Noeline stand together^ 
guns in hand. 

Noeline. 
We've just time to walk through Silverthorn Cop- 



THE AMAZONS. 119 

pice before dusk. {^Taking her place between Wilhel- 
MiNA and Thomasin.] Gentlemen, a final word — 
\looking round.'] Where is Lord Tweenwayes. 

Thomasin. 
[Calling.'] Tweenwayes ! 

LiTTERLY. 

Tweeny 

De Grival. 
Tweenwayes, my friend ! 

All. 

Tweenwayes 

[Tweenwayes enters from below the hedge, 
A red flush suffuses his nose and cheeks, 

Wilhelmina. 
Oh, dear ! 

Thomasin. 

Queer, Tweeny ? 

Tweenwayes. 
We ought never to take tea. 

Noeline. 

Gentlemen, my brothers and I bid you good after- 
noon. 

Thomasin. 
Good-afternoon. 



I20 THE AMAZONS. 

WiLHELMINA. 



Good-afternoon. 



NOELINE. 



We have been extremely wrong in receiving you 
here. 

Thomasin. 
[Emphatically.'] Yes. 

NOELINE. 

You are almost equally to blame for permitting 
us to do so. 

WiLHELMINA. 

Ah, yes. 

Thomasin. 
No doubt about that ! 

NOELINE. 

We ask you to forget that you have entered Over- 
cote Park. In a few hours the grass will revive 
where you have trodden — let that be a hint to 
your memories. Now be kind enough to leave the 
park at once. Good-bye. 

[The men advance together and shake hands 
with the girls. 

LiTTERLY, 

Thanks for a splendid time. 



THE AMAZONS, 121 

TWEENWAYES. 

Most interesting day. 

De Grival. 

Ah, I have liked myself here ! 

\The men return to their places^ raising their 
hats as the girls go through the gate, 

NOELINE. 

Where's Fitton ? 

Thomasin. 
Jo! 

WiLHELMINA. 

He'll follow. 

NOELINE. 

Come, boys ! 

\They disappear. Sunset appears. Litterly 
sits thoughtfully ; Tween waves and De 
Grival stand together^ eyeing him. 

De Grival. 

[To Tweenwayes.] What to do ? How to give 
Harrington the slip ? 

Tweenwayes. 

[To De Grival.] We simply leave the park 
now with him and walk to the station. 

De Grival. 
Don' cher know ? 



122 THE AMAZONS. 

TWEENWAYES. 

It will be easy to invent an excuse for our not 
sharing his compartment. For instance, he will 
smoke. 

De Grival. 

Ah, necessity is the mother of objecting to a 
smoking-carriage ! 

TwEENWAYES. 

Just as the train is starting we two get out and 
speed back to Overcote. 

De Grival. 
My friend ! How quick the brain 

TWEENWAYES. 

We are seldom at a loss. \_Advancing to Lit- 
TERLY.] You catch the next train, I presume, 
Utterly ? 

LiTTERLY. 

[Indifferently,'] Oh, I catch it or lose it. [To 
himself^ She's glorious ! 

TwEENWAYES. 

[AnnoyedJ] De Grival and I catch it. 

LiTTERLY. 

Good luck, old chaps. [To himself.] She's 
splendid ! 



THE AMAZONS 123 

TWEENWAYES. 

It would have been pleasant for us all to have 
^nished the day together. 

LiTTERLY. 

Don't bother about me ; I may stroll about and 
go back later. 

[De Grival and Tweenwayes retire and 
consult together. 

De Grival. 
\To Tweenwayes. J What to do ? 

Tweenwayes. 
[ Vaguely.'\ We are seldom at a loss. 

De Grival. 
Your plan has broken up. 

Tweenwayes. 
Dash it, manage it yourself ! 

De Grival. 

[Coming to Litterly.] My dear Barrington, our 
word to the ladies. Honesty is the best way out of 
the park. [Taking Tweenwayes' arm,'\ Tween- 
wayes and I now go. 

l!lTTERLY. 

\JRising.'\ Oh, which way ? 



124 THE AMAZONS. 

De Grival. 
The way we entered. 

LiTTERLY. 

All right — run along. 

De Grival. 
[ To LiTTERLY.] Which way do you ? 

LiTTERLY. 

The way / entered. {^Waving his handJ] See 
you soon. 

De Grival. 

[ Waving his hand.l A pleasant picnic together ! 
Good-bye ! 

LiTTERLY. 

[Taking out a cigarette. ~\ Ta, ta ! 

TWEENWAYES. 

{Glaring at Litterly.] He drops us ! Insolent ! 

[TwEENWAYES and De Grival go off^ arm- 
in-arm^ below the hedge. Litterly espies 
Thomasin's note which De Grival has 
dropped by the tree. 

Litterly. 

\_Ficking up the note,'] Hullo! {Reading.'] "Dear 
M. de Grival. Am asking you and Tweenwayes to 
come up to the Hall when dark to see me and Billy 



THE AMAZONS, 125 

and to talk about snubbing this horrid Litterly, who 
no one excepting Noe/ Ukes poking his nose about 
our park." Illiterate little beast! \Resuming.'\ 
" We can't entertain you tip-top, as it must be in 
our old shut-up schoolroom, but there will be a 
decent weed and, please Heaven, sloes in brandy. 
The following is the way in." ^Looking after 
TwEENWAYES and De Grival.] Confound 'em ! 
\Resuming.'\ " Skirt the lawn and make for East 
Wing. Clamber on to red-tiled lean-to outhouse. 
From there on to roof of dwarf tower. Find the 
skylight. Lift up skylight and drop through. 
Wait in the dark till we turn up. Tweeny has 
accepted. Keep your eye on him when on the roof 
as he is a bit gone over at the knees. Yours up 
to date. T. Belturbet." Designing little mass of 
tattoo! I say, by Jove, I'll play the dooce with 
these fellows I 

[De Grival runs up^ scared^ hatkss^ and dis- 
ordered. 

De Grival. 
My dear Barrington ! 

Litterly. 
[^Slipping the note into his pocket."] Hullo ! 

De Grival. 

We have encountered — not a pirate — no, no, a 
poacher. We are hurt. 

Litterly. 
Where's Tweenwayes ? 



126 THE AMAZONS. 

TwEENWAYES enters. His hat is crushed down over 
his eyes., his clothes are torn., a?td generally he pre- 
sents evidetice of having been engaged in a struggle. 

De Grival. 
[Embracing Tweenwayes.] My friend I 

LiTTERLY. 

[Fulling De Grival away."] What have they 
been doing to you, Tweeny ? 

Tweenwayes. 

Just as we got to the brook — great hulking brute 
— putting down nets — never heard such language 
in my life — wanted to know why an honest man 
wasn't allowed to earn a living. I said we never 
answered questions of that sort — 

De Grival. 

My head ! 

Tweenwayes. 

Yes, yes, the wretch knocked De Grival's head 
against mine, twice. 

De Grival. 

Three times. 

Tweenwayes. 

Possibly. I left off counting. Luckily somebody 
came up and enabled us to get away. A poaching 
beast ! 



THE AMAZONS. 127 

LiTTERLY. 

Come on, you chaps ! 

TWEENWAYES. 

{^Detaining Litterly.] No, no, don't interfere — 
he's choking the keeper. [Litterly runs off.l Oh, 
it's a filthy park ! 

De Grival. 

[Leaning against a tree.] My head is a very bad 
one. 

TWEENWAYES. 

[Feeling his leg.'] We can't stand being knocked 
about. Heavens, this limb is injured ! 

De Grival. 
Did you see me kick him ? 

TWEENWAYES. 

Kick him ! 

De Grival. 
The poacher — I thought I had broken him. 

TWEENWAYES. 

Fool ! that was my leg ! 

Orts, a most forbidding-looking rustic, emerges from 
the thicket. 

De Grival. 
[Turning.] Ah ! 



128 THE AMAZONS. 



Orts. 



Theer 'ee be agen ! Git 'ee out of my way ! 
\Fli7iging De Grival to the ground and deali?ig 
TwEENWAYES a blow which knocks him doum.'] I be 
a poor agricultural labourer. Gi' me all the goold 
you've got on 'ee ! 

TWEENWAYES. 

\_Emptying his pockets.'] Oh, this is an atrocious 
park ! \_Giving his money to Orts.] Go away ! 

Orts. 

Farmin' be bad in these parts, I tell 'ee. This 
beaint all ! 

TwEENWAYES. 

\Faintly?^ We never carry much loose money. 

Orts. 
Then I'll blacken thy other eye for 'ee ! 

TwEENWAYES. 

My friend changed a note this morning! Try 
my friend ! 

[Orts turns to De Grival, who commences 
to search for his money. 

Orts. 

\^To De Grival.] I tell 'ee I be thoroughly de- 
servin' ! Thy goold ! 

Litterly enters from below the hedge, followed by 
Fitton. He seizes Orts and pinions him from 
behind. 



THE AMAZONS, 129 

LiTTERLY. 

\_To FiTTON.] Your belt, Fitton ! Do you know 
the scoundrel ? 

[Fitton takes a strap from his waist, and 
he and Litterly secure Orts's arms. 

Fitton. 

John Orts, m'lord ; a poacher since he were a 
babby ! 

Orts. 

I be the sole support o' my mother, I be. Not 
a single Sunday marnin' sarvice 'ave I missed at 
Scrumleigh church this ten year. 

Litterly. 
Now then, Fitton, what shall we do ? 

Fitton. 

\^To Litterly.] If we make p'lice business o' 
this m'lord, it'll come out theer's been some rakes 
about th' park arter our young gentlemen. Folks 
will be talking. 

Litterly. 

{To Fitton.] That's true. Better run the 
scoundrel off the place and have done with him. 

T ween WA YES. 

{Faintly^^ Another moment and I should have 
had his name and address. 



I30 THE AMAZONS. 

LiTTERLY. 

\To FiTTON.] Put my frienas on their legs. 
[7I7 0RTS.] Get on! 

Orts. 

\^Going?[ I were i' th' church choir five year, 
singin' loike a cherrybim. 

\He disappears^ Iatt^^iy following him. 

FiTTON. 

\Raising Tweenwayes. ] Hey, thy left eye be a 
rum'un. 

[Tweenwayes sits on the stump of a tree ; his 
eye is slightly discoloured, Fitton picks 
up De Grival. 

Tweenwayes. 
[Almost in tears.'] Heavens, what a park! 

De Grival. 
[To Fitton.] A doctor very near ? Tell me. 

Fitton. 

If it be only bruises, sir, Bowser, High Street, 
Scrumleigh, Chemist and Druggist. 

De Grival. 

[To Tweenwayes.] My friend, let us go and be 
drugged. [Looking at Tweenwayes, zvho rises.] 
Ah, a great change in you. 



THE AMAZONS, 131 

TWEENWAYES. 

We scar quickly. 

De Grival. 

\Taking his arm.'] It is a wise father who knows 
his own friend when he has such a bad eye. 

[TwEENWAYES a?id De Grival disappear. 
After a brief pause, De Grival returns. 

De Grival. 

[Calling to Tween waves.] In a moment I come 
after you. [7b Fitton, hurriedly.] Mister what- 
your-name, I did not rescue you from that pirate — 
that poacher? 

Fitton. 

[Touching his cap.] No, sir, that I swear ye 
didn't. 

De Grival. 
No — but it would not hurt you to swear I did. 

Fitton. 
Well, sir — 

De Grival. 

Listen to me — [ Taking a handful of money from 
his pocket. Tweenwayes re-entering wiperceived, 
steals down suspiciously, and stands behind De 
Grival and Fitton, listening.] You go to Lady 
Wilhelmina directly, at once. [Giving him money. '\ 
One sovereign. You tell her of this aifair. [Giv- 



132 THE AMAZONS. 

ing him money.] Two pound. You say I found 
that poacher strangling your throat. [Giving him 
money.] Another. You tell Lady Wilhelmina I 
kick him, I rescue you, I kick you — no, no, I kick 
him again. I save your life, ah, bravely ! [Giving 
him more money.] Don' cher know ! 

TWEENWAYES. 

[Coming between Fitton and De Grival.] Mon- 
sieur de Grival ! 

De Grival. 

Ah! 

TWEENWAYES. 

Permit me to say that, if any representation of 
this kind is made — / — I must be — 

De Grival. 

In it ? [TWEENWAYES bows with dignity.] I have 
no objection. 

TWEENWAYES. 

[To Fitton.] You will see Lady Thomasin as 
well as Lady Wilhelmina. [Searching his pockets.] 
Monsieur de Grival and /found the poacher chok- 
ing you. This gentleman and /, at great personal 
risk, preserved your — heavens, that villain has my 
money ! 

De Grival. 

Ah ! [Producing money and offering it to Tween- 
wayes.] I loan you. 



THE AMAZONS. 133 

TWEENWAYES. 

\To himself^ hesitating^ Can I? {^Taking the 
money and giving it to Fitton.] You understand ? 

FiTTON. 

[Touching his cap.'] Yes, m'lord. 

[TwEENWAYES Movcs away. 

De Grival. 

\_To Yyyuq^^ pointing to Tweenwayes.] We now 
save your life, both of us, ah, bravely ! Don'cher 
know ? 

Fitton. 

I know, sir. 

De Grival. 

\_Goi7ig to Tweenwayes.] We reconcile each 
other ? [Tweenwayes reluctantly extends two fingers. 
De Grival cheerfully takes his arm again.] My 
friend ! [ They go off. It is now dusk. 

Fitton. 

[Counting his money. '\ Dang it, it won't do me 
no hurt tellin' a few lies about 'un. Two — three 
— four. 

Litterly re-enters. 

LiTTERLY. 

Where are my friends, Fitton ? 

Fitton. 
[Pocketing the money.] They be just gone. 



134 THE AMAZONS. 

LiTTERLY. 

\^To himself^ chuckling. 'I By Jove, I mean to play 
Old Harry with 'em ! Ha, ha, ha ! \_Sitting and 
holding his arm.'] Oh, I say ! 

FiTTON. 

Twisted thy arm, m'lord ? 

LiTTERLY. 

[ Taking out his pocket-handkerchief. ] Fitton, wrap 
this handkerchief round my wrist, as tightly as you 
can. \_To himself.] Ho, ho, these fellows ! 

Fitton. 

[Looking at Litterly's arm.] Eh, the scoundrel's 
hurt'ee ! 

LiTTERLY. 

No, no, Lady Noeline was kind enough to do that 
with a hair-pin and a red root that grows about the 
park. Lady Noeline and I are cousins, you know, 
Fitton. Go on. 

Fitton 
\_Blankly.] A red root that grows hereabouts. 

LiTTERLY. 

Yes. [Putting his foot on a piece of the root which 
lies on the ground. ~\ Here's a bit of it. 

Fitton. 
[Picking up the root.] That ? 



THE AMAZONS. 135 

NOELINE, 

\In the distance^ calling?^ Joe ! Halloa ! Fitton ! 

FiTTON. 

[ Going to the gate.] The young gentlemen be on 
their way back to the Hall. 

LiTTERLY hastily conceals himself behind a tree. 
NoELlNE enters. 

NOELINE. 

\_Stopping at the gate.] Fitton, why do you leave 
us like this ? 

Fitton. 

[77? NoELiNE, over the gate.] 'Scuse me, m'lord 
[^showing the sprig he has in his hand] , be that the 
weed you've been ruddling young Lord Latterby's 
arm wi' ? 

NOELINE.. 

Who told you anything about that ? Take my 
gun ; I'm going home. 

Fitton. 
M'lord. this be the wrong stuff, I tell'ee. 

NOELINE. 

Eh? 

Fitton. 

The Red Root hasn't grown here at Overcote 
many a year. This 'ere be crimson snake-wort ; it 
be a rank bad poison, they do tell me. 



136 THE AMAZONS. 

NOELINE. 

[Coming through the gate.'] Fitton ! 

FiTTON. 

\Looking towards the tree.~\ Sssh ! 

NOELINE. 

Fitton, you don't mean — to say — I've really 
hurt my cousin's arm ! 

Fitton. 

Lord Latterby, m'lord. 

[NoELiNE sees Litterly. Fitton goes quietly 
away. Litterly advances to Noeline. 

NOELINE. 

[Agitatedly.] Oh, Lord Litterly — ! 

Litterly. 
I say, here's a game ! 

Noeline. 

A game ! Don't stand there looking at me ! Get 
out of the park ! Why did you ever come here t 
Go — go to Doctor Flack at Great Overcote ! 
Don't you hear me ? [Shaking him.] Run — run 
to Doctor Flack ! 

Litterly. 

[Calmly.] Why, I've never been to a doctor in 
my life. 



THE AMAZONS. 137 

NOELINE. 

\Faintly^^ You must now. \ Clinging to him.'] 
Oh! oh! 

LiTTERLY. 

[^Supporting her, soothingly.'] Don't ! don't ! Ah, 
I know how to hold you ! 

NOELINE. 

\_Getting away.] How dare you- I — I hate 
you ! 

LiTTERLY. 

Do you 1 Then I swear to go to no doctor 

NOELINE. 

Pshaw ! What do I care ! It serves you right. 
\_Goi7tg up to the gate and opening it; while he sits 
whistling. Then hesitating and returning to him.] 
Lord Litterly — ! 

LiTTERLY. 

Hullo? 

NOELINE. 

Won't anything make you go to the doctor ? 

LiTTERLY. 

Yes, tell me you don't hate me. 

NOELINE. 

[After a pause.'] I don't hate you. 

[He 7'ises aiid clasps her in his arms. Thom- 
ASIN «/z^ WiLHELMiNA enter followed by 

FiTTON. 



138 THE AMAZONS. 

Thomasin. 

\At the gate.l Noel ! [Noeline and Litterly 
separate. Meeting Litterly and speaking fiercely. '\ 
What do you mean by this ? 

Litterly. 

\_Triumphantly.'] Ha, ha! Cousin Tommy ! 

[He throws his arms round Thomasin and 
kisses her. She screams in a very feminine 
way. He runs off. 

Thomasin. 

\_Rubbing her face vigorously with her handkerchief 
and speaking to Noeline.] You — you — ! Do you 
call yourself a man ? 

Noeline. 
No ! I'm a girl ! I don't want to be anything 
else ! 

\_She runs off, through the open gate. WiL- 
HELMiNA, Thomasin and Fitton re- 
main looking after her. 



end of second act. 



THE AMAZONS. 139 



THE THIRD ACT. 

The scene is a gymnasium at Overcote Hall — a large 
apartment artistically decorated a7id fitted with 
gymftastic apparatus. Halfway up the room is 
an arch, which, supported on two pilasters, di- 
vides the ceiling from the sky-lights. A door on 
the left opefis on to a passage, while on the right 
is the door of a spacious cupboard. A vaulting- 
horse, a suspended rope, parallel bars and a hori- 
zontal bar are prominefit features of the apart- 
ment, while there are also a settee, table, and 
upright pianoforte. The place is in darkness, but 
a faint blue is seen through the sky-lights and the 
large window at the e7id of the room. After a 
short silence, there are the sounds of meat's voices 
in whispers and the breaking of glass ; then a 
man's hat drops from above, and De Grival is 
seen descending, with difficulty, with the aid of the 
rope. 

De Grival. 

\In a whisper to Tweenwayes, who is above."] 
Tweenwayes, my friend, be careful ; it is not easy. 



140 



THE AMAZONS. 



TWEENWAYES. 

\^Out of sight. '^ Oh ! look out ! I'm descending ! 
\_Coming down.'] Hold the thing ! hold it ! 



Hold where ? 



[JVearly down?\ 
[ U7ider his brealh.^ 



You are hurt ! 



De Grival. 



TWEENWAYES. 

The rope ! 
Fool ! fool ! 



\_IIe falls,] Ah ! 



De Grival. 



TWEENWAYES. 

[Crawling along.] Heavens, yes ! 
[De Grival picks him up. 



Their appear- 
De Grival's 



ance is very dilapidated, 
clothes are soiled^ his hair has become laftk, 
and there is a star-shaped patch of 7vhite 
plaster on his brow. Tweenwayes wears 
a small black sJiade over his injured eye. 

De Grival. 

One thing we may congratulate ourselves — we 
arrive. 

Tweenwayes. 

Arrive ! How can I be certain that we have 
strictly carried out Lady Thomasin's instructions ? 
The mere idea of your losing that note fills me with 
— [ Walking agaifist the vaulting horse.] Oh ! 



THE AMAZONS, 141 

De Grival. 

My friend, what is done cannot be made different 
— \_Coming ifito contact with the support of the hori- 
zontal bar!\ Ah! damitall! 

TWEENWAYES. 

[^Examining the vaulting horse and the horizontal 
bar with the aid of his magnifying glass. '\ De Grival, 
I have a shocking misgiving. 

De Grival. 
Misgiving ? 

Tweenwayes. 

Heavens, I believe we're in the Gymnasium ! 

De Grival. 
Gymnasium ! 

Tweenwayes. 

Our instincts are rarely at fault. [Coming against 
the parallel bars.'] Oh! 



You are hurt ? 
Yes. 



De Grival. 

Tweenwayes. 

De Grival. 



But I remember Lady Thomasin's letter, every 
word of it. [Holding his head.] " Clamber on to 
our old schoolroom . . . find a skylight in a roof 
. . . lift up the tiles of a outhouse . . . climb on to 



142 THE AMAZONS. 

a tower . . . drop off and wait there till we turn up 
. . . yours, gone over at the knees, T. Belturbet." 

[TwEENWAYES falls over the Indian clubs ; 
there is a great rattle. 

De Grival. 
You are hurt again ? 

TwEENWAYES. 

Yes. But wasn't there something about the 
West Wing? You said so. 

De Grival. 
Certainly, the West Wing. Or the — ah, I think ! 

TwEENWAYES. 

You think ! 

De Grival. 

My friend, pardon me — I fear I have changed a 
wing! 

TwEENWAYES. 

\To himself. '\ Fool ! fool ! {^Starting back as his 
hand drops on to the keys of the piano. \ Oh ! 

De Grival. 
You are hurt ! 

TwEENWAYES. 

No, I am not ! 



THE AMAZONS. 143 

De Grival. 
\_ Joining him !\ What to do? 

TWEENWAYES. 

You may do what you please, Monsieur de 
Grival ; so far as I am concerned, this visit to Over- 
cote has come to a wretched close. 

\_He goes to the rope^ attempts to climb it^ and 
fails. 

De Grival. 
[ Watching him."] Ah, you cannot ! 

TWEENWAYES. 

Heavens, it's beyond me ! [^Sitting on the settee 
despondingly,~\ What a horrible predicament ! This 
reminds me of many a page in our history. The 
dungeon, the prisoner. \_jRubbing his shins.^ Even 
the implements of torture ! 

De Grival. 
[^Sitting beside him in great dejection.'] My spirits 

go- 

Tweenwayes. 

We have no spirits. 

De Grival. 

\_Taking his hand.'] My friend ! 

\_A pair of legs appear from above clinging to 
the rope. 



144 THE AMAZONS 

TwEEN WAVES and De Grival. 
Oh! 

De Grival. 
\In a whisper ^^ What is it ? 

Tweenwaves. 
Surely, legs. 

De Grival. 
Ah, Wilhelmina ! 

{The legs descend and Litterly is revealed. 

De Grival. 
\Rising!\ Barrington ! 

Tweenwaves. 
{Rising?^ Litterly ! 

Litterly. 

Hullo ! There you are ! 

[Litterly comes between De Grival and 
Tweenwaves. His arm is slung in a 
black silk handkerchief. 

Litterly. 

Now then, I should like to know what you've got 
to say for yourselves. 

Tweenwaves. 
We never give explanations. 



THE AMAZONS. 145 

LiTTERLY. 

\To TwEENWAYES.] You catch the next train, 
don't you ? 

TWEENWAYES. 

Really, this tone — ! 

LiTTERLY. 

It would be pleasant to finish the day together, 
wouldn't it ? \To De Grival.] Our word to the 
ladies ! Honesty is the best way out of the park ! 
\_Taking Tweenwayes' arm.'\ Tweenwayes and I 
now go ! 

De Grival. 

\Penitmtly?[ My friend ! 

Tweenwayes. 

\^Releasing himself. "^ You may not be aware, Lit- 
terly, that De Grival and I are here in the position 
of invited guests. 

LiTTERLY. 

Oh, yes, I'm aware of it. \_Handing Thomasin's 
note to De Grival.] I picked up the invitation. 

De Grival and Tweenwayes. 
Ah! 

LiTTERLY. 

And you may not be aware, my dear Tweeny, 
that that invitation directs you to the East Wing, 
and you are now in the West Wing. 



146 THE AMAZONS 

TWEENWAYES. 

Monsieur de Grival ! 

De Grival. 
Ah, I commit an error ! Pardon me I 

TWEENWAYES. 

Never ! We never forgive an injury of this kind. 
\To LiTTERLY.] How am I to get out? 

LiTTERLY. 

The rope — 

De Grival. 
Bah ! he cannot climb it ! 

TWEENWAYES. 

Nor you, sir ! [ Under his breath^ Insolent ! 

De Grival. 
You say so ! I try ! 

\He goes to the rope and attempts to climb it. 

LiTTERLY. 

[ Walking about.'] I've followed you fellows over 
about five miles of roof. Where the dooce have 
you got to? Why, I say, confound you, we're in 
the gym. ! 

TWEENWAYES. 

I knew it! I felt it! 



THE AMAZONS. 147 

LiTTERLY. 

By Jove, this is too bad of us — we really ought 
to draw the line somewhere. [Pointing to the door.l 
Isn't that the door ? 

TWEENWAYES. 

[Opening the door cautiously?^ A passage. And 
lights at the end of it {closing the door~\. 

LiTTERLY. 

[Opening the opposite door.] A cupboard. 

De Grival. 

\Half-way up the rope."] Ah, I succeed I I tri- 
umph ! I do it ! Don' cher know ! 

LiTTERLY. 

Bravo, Andre ! We shall have to leave Tweeny 
behind us ! 

TwEENWAYES. 

[ Under his breath^ Insolent ! 

\The electric lights are switched on, and the 
scene becomes suddenly bright, De Grival 
descends precipitately. 

De Grival. 
Ah! 

Tweenwayes. 
Heavens ! 



148 THE AMAZONS. 

LiTTERLY. 

I say I 

TWEENWAYES. 

Voices ! voices ! 

LiTTERLY. 

\At the cupboard door.~\ Look out, you fellows ! 

[De Grival runs into the cupboard^ and 
1atty.-^\n pushes in Tween waves, who is 
hesitating, then goes in himself. After a 
brief pause, '''• Sergeant ^^ Shuter enters. 
She wears a costume of coarse, dark 
material, a blouse, a skirt finishing just 
below the knees, and gymnasium shoes. 

Shuter. 

\^At the door."] Now then, m'lord ! Where are 
the rest ? A quarter-of-an-hour late as it is ! 
[Thomasin, Wilhelmina, a?id Noeline enter. 
They are enveloped in long cloaks ?\ What's the 
matter with you this evening t You all seem as 
stupid as owls, every one of you • 

Thomasin. 

Don't you be cheeky, Sergeant, Or I'll tell the 
mater. 

Shuter. 
/'// tell her ladyship. 

Thomasin. 
We're not inclined for the gym. to-night. There ! 



THE AMAZONS. 149 

WiLHELMINA. 

We — we've had rather a tiring day, Sergeant. 

Shuter. 

\^To NoELiNE, who is leaning dejectedly against the 
vaulting-horse.'] Well, Lord Noel, if ever I did see 
anybody looking exactly like putty — ! 

NOELINE. 

I don't care what I look like ! 

Shuter. 

\_Clapping her hands.] Come along, now ! Key, 
please ! [Noeline locks the door and takes out the 
key. Bringing down the Indian clubs?\ I always 
have said that when your lordships come back from 
these wretched holiday-trips your muscles are like 
apple jelly. 

Noeline. 

[^Throwing her the key.] Catch and be quiet ! 

[Shuter catches the key and slips it i?tto her 
pocket. 

Shuter. 

{Bringing down the bar bells.] If I were m'lady 
I'd stop visitings altogether. [Noeline sits on the 
settee in an attitude of despondency.] There's the re- 
sult of it ! I suppose you've been dancing half the 
night through in those petticoats of yours ! Ah, I 
wonder you like to wear such things ! {^Bringing 



ISO THE AMAZONS. 

down the. dumb bells.'] Now then, Lord Tommy — 
Lord Willy ! 

[WiLHELMiNA ^w^Thomasin hurry forward 
sulkily. 

WiLHELMiNA and Thomasin. 
[To themselves.'] Oh ! 

Shuter. 

[^Turning up her sleeves?^ Ten minutes' simple 
exercise to thaw the ice. Ready ? \Loudly?^ Ready ? 

NOELINE. 

\Rising^ Yes. 

WiLHELMiNA. 

Yes. 

Thomasin. 
\Loudly!\ Yes. 

Shuter. 

Come, my lords ! A good appetite for dinner ! 

[Shuter sits at the piano and thumps out a 
strongly marked tune. The girls take off 
their cloaks and throw them down angrily ; 
they are in elegantly made gymnasium 
dresses of different colours. 

Noeline. 

"^Pushing Thomasin.] There's no room for me 
here. 



THE AMAZONS, 151 

Thomasin. 
[Obstinately.'] This is my place. 

NOELINE. 

You're a most ungentlemanly fellow. 

Thomasin. 
Because I caught you kissing Litterly! 

NOELINE. 

What—! 

WiLHELMINA. 

\_Coming between them with the dumb bells in her 
hands.'] Oh, please don't quarrel again ! Don't ! 

NOELINE. 

Never interfere, Willy ! 

Thomasin. 

Out of the way, baby ! 

[WiLHELMINA is pushed over to the settee, 
where she sits crying and rubbing the 
dumb bells into her eyes. 

NOELINE. 

\_To Thomasin.] At any rate, if I were to so far 
forget myself, I shouldn't be kissing a worm. 

Thomasin. 
You allude to my friend Tweeny ! 



152 THE AMAZONS. 

NOELINE. 

[^Swinging her clubs.'] You seem — to have no 
doubt — as to whom — the denomination — applies. 

Thomasin. 

[Fiercely, as she picks up a bar-bell^ Noel, do you 
remember my dropping a forty pound bar-bell on to 
Shuter's toes, in the summer, by accident ? 

NOELINE. 

Clumsy ! Yes. 

Thomasin. 

[Lifting her bar-bell.] Well — it wasn^t an acci- 
dent. 

NOELINE. 

Oh ! 

[Shuter abruptly discotitinues playing and 
looks around. 

Shuter. 
Well, I never — ! you — you — ! 

Thomasin, Wilhelmina and Noeline. 

All right. Sergeant ! 

\They commence their exercise. Shuter re- 
sumes playing, with an occasional glance 
round. Keeping one eye on Shuter, 
Thomasin gets near^ to Wilhelmina. 



THE AMAZONS. IS3 

Thomasin. 

{^Speaking during her exercise to Wilhelmina.] 
Billy, I wonder when we shall get to Tweeny and 
De Grival! 

Wilhelmina. 

\To Thomasin.] Poor fellows, how lonely they 
must be in the dark ! 

Thomasin. 
I hope Tweeny hasn't broken a leg or anything. 

Wilhelmina. 
Oh, don't ! 

Thomasin. 

He looks a bit brittle. 

{Their exercise becomes languid. 

Wilhelmina. 

It was awfully plucky of Andre, protecting Fitton 
from that poacher, wasn't it ? 

Thomasin. 
And Tweeny ! 

Wilhelmina. 
I mean both. 

Thomasin. 

What did Fitton tell you about it ? 

{They cease their exercise altogether and, for- 
getting Shuter, sit on the settee side-by- 
side. 



154 THE AMAZONS. 

WiLHELMINA. 

Why, Fitton said that Andre lifted the poacher 
high in the air, like a baby. 



Thomasin. 

That's right — and then threw him to Tweeny 
who caught him ten yards off. 

WiLHELMINA. 

What did Tweenwayes do then ? 

Thomasin. 
Shook him blue and chucked him back to Andrd 

WiLHELMINA. 

I shouldn't have thought Tweenwayes quite 
equal to all that. 

Thomasin. 
Nor I Andre. You never know men. 

WiLHELMINA. 

ISadly.'] I suppose you oughtn't to. [Noeline's 
exercise has flagged by degrees ; she now sits on the 
vaulting-horse with her back to the others.'] Just 
look at Noel ! 

Thomasin. 

I s'pose Noel calls that club exercise — / call it 
shirking. 



THE AMAZONS. 155 

WiLHELMINA. 

Tommy, it's an awful thing to realise, but, after 
what we saw, there can be no doubt that Noel 1 — 
1 — likes Litterly, eh ? 

Thomasin. 
Doubt ! 

WiLHELMINA. 

Oh, things are getting pretty serious at Overcote, 
don't you think ? 

Thomasin. 

Billy, old chap, dashed if I know what the dooce 
is coming over us all ! 

WiLHELMINA. 

\_Sighing?\ Ah ! 

[Shuter again suddenly ceases playing^ turns, 
and rises. 

Shuter. 

I guessed it ! \_In great commotion, the girls rush 
to their places and resume their exercise^ I've caught 
you ! Every bit of this shall go to m'lady. Now, 
my lords, no more nonsense, please ! Back with 
those toys ! 

\The girls replace the clubs, bar bells, and dumb 
bells at the further end of the room. 

Thomasin. 
[77? WiLHELMINA.] We've made the Sergeant 
wild now ! 



IS6 THE AMAZONS. 

WiLHELMINA. 

And I've no chocolate in my pocket to get her 
round again ! 

Shuter. 

{Gathering up the cloaks. '\ Wiping the floor with 
these things, too ! Isn't there a proper place for 
them ? Lord Noel, Lord Willy — on to the Bar, 
both of you ! Lord Tommy, thirty vaults without 
stopping for wind! 

[NoELiNE and Wilhelmina spring on to the 
horizontal-bar and Thomasin comes to 
the vaulting-horse as Shuter, carrying the 
cloaks, opens the cupboard door. The men 
appear ; Shuter, dropping the cloaks, ut- 
ters a yell of terror a?id runs over to the 
other side of the room. There is a general 
uproar, the girls scream, Tweenwayes 
running across the room is seized by 
Shuter and violently shaken. Escaping 
from her, he makes for the rope, where he 
meets De Grival, who has crawled under 
the vaulting-horse ; they attempt to climb 
the rope together, impeding each other's 
progress. 

Noeline. 
It's Litterly! 

Wilhelmina. 
Andre de Grival ! 

Thomasin. 
Why, Tweeny ! 



THE AMAZONS. 157 

LiTTERLY. 

Hush ! hush ! Come back, you fellows ! Be 
quiet, everybody ! I say, do let me speak ! 

Shuter. 

\_Going to LiTTERLY and shaking him.'] Who are 
you all ? What are you doing here ? 

[NoELiNE comes down quickly, places herself 
betweeft Litterly a7id Shuter, and seizes 
the latter by the collar. 

Noeline. 

You coward, Shuter! Don't you see Lord Lit- 
terly's arm is in a sling ? 

Shuter. 

[Staring at Litterly.] Lord Litterly ! Oh, my 
lord! 

Litterly. 

{^Advancing to Shuter.] Hullo ! Why — Letty ! 

Shuter. 

{^Hysterically.] Oh, m'lord, what is the meaning 
of this.? 

Litterly. 

I say, now don't upset yourself ! I am glad to 
see you ! \Kissifig her.] 

Noeline. 

\To Litterly.] Do you know what you're do- 
ing ? You're kissing our Sergeant ! 



IS8 THE AMAZONS. 

LiTTERLY. 

I should think so ! Letty Shuter is my old nurse's 
daughter ; we were brought up together — Letty 
was married from Bambridge Castle ! \Kissi?ig 
Shuter again.'] I should think I am kissing your 
Sergeant! \_Quietly to Noeline.] Leave her to 
me — it's all right. 

[Thomasin, Wilhelmina, De Grival, and 
TwEENWAYES are talking together with 
much animation. Noeline joins them. 
« Shuter sinks on to the settee holding her 

heart and panting ; Litterly places him- 
self beside her. 

Litterly. 
I say, Letty dear, how jolly ! 

Shuter. 

Jolly ! Oh dear, oh dear ! I'll never get over 
this fright ! \Pushing him away and attempting to 
rise.] You wretch ! 

Litterly. 

[Restraining her.] What, when I haven't seen 
you for years ! 

Shuter. 

As if you came here to see me ! Who are the 
others ? 

Litterly. 

My friends, Lord Tweenwayes and Monsieur de 
Grival. 



THE AMAZONS. 159 

Shuter. 

My lords' sweethearts up in Scotland ! I've 
heard of it ! 

\^She agaift attempts to rise ; he pulls her back 
and puts his arm round her waist. 

LiTTERLY. 

Letty, I'll tell you something ! Keep quiet ! 
[ Whispering into her ear.'\ I say — ! 

Shuter. 

What ! Lord Noel ! \He nods, laughing?^ Oh, I 
won't help you, either of you ! 

S^She again tries to leave him; he rises and 
stands before her, pushing her back when- 
ever she attempts to rise. 

LiTTERLY. 

Letty, be reasonable ! What are you frightened 
tibout ? If I give you my word that I will person- 
ally be answerable for the perfect behaviour of your 
young gentlemen, will that satisfy you, 

Shuter. 
No 

LiTTERLY. 

Why, Lady Castlejordan's away, isn't she ? 

Shuter. 
She'll be home to-morrow. 



i6o THE AMAZONS. 

LiTTERLY. 

But we don't intend to stay till to-morrow. 

Shuter. 
I'll take care of that ! 

LiTTERLY. 

That's right, always do your duty. [Looking at 
his watch.'] Now, at what time do your young gen- 
tlemen dine ? 

Shuter. 

A quarter-past eight. 

LiTTERLY. 

Then at a quarter to eight we leave. 

Shuter. 
On your honour, m'lord ? 

LiTTERLY. 

Letty, on my honour! [_She rises; he kisses her 
again a7id puts her back?^ I am pleased to see you. 
Gentlemen, at a quarter to eight punctually, we 
clear out. I have pledged my word to that eifect to 
my dear old friend, Mrs. Shuter. So, I warn you, 
you must make the most of your time. 

Shuter. 
\^Starting up.] No, they mustn't 1 



THE AMAZONS, i6i 

WiLHELMINA. 

{^Running up to Shuter and hugging her."] Oh, 
Shuter, dear, you've never been so nice ! 

Thomasin. 
\_To Shuter.] Sergeant, you're a brick ! 

WiLHELMINA. 

Come and talk to Lord Tweenwayes and Mon- 
sieur de Grival ; your mind will be so easy. 

[Thomasin ^«// Wilhelmina take Shuter 
to Tweenwayes and De Grival. 

Noeline. 

\_To LiTTERLY, very coldly. '\ What aid Dr. Flack 
say about your arm } 

LiTTERLY. 

Rubbed stuff into it and made a frightful fuss. 

Noeline. 
Oh, there isn't any danger, is there ? 

LiTTERLY. 

Not the slightest — right in a week. 

Noeline. 

[Coldly again.'] I knew there was no occasion for 
you to be so alarmed. 

[She walks away^ he following her. 



i62 THE AMAZONS, 

LiTTERLY. 

I say, what have I done now ? 

NOELINE. 

Aren't you here / 

LiTTERLY. 

I came after Tweenwayes and De Grival. I 

didn't expect this would happen. 

NOELINE. 

As it has happened, you might have had the 
decency to shower your kisses on that woman in the 
cupboard ! 

LiTTERLY. 

I would have done so if I thought that you — 

NOELINE. 

Oh, I don't protest against the vulgar exhibition 
on my own account, but I have young brothers — 

LiTTERLY. 

I kissed her with a motive — 

NOELINE. 

I'm sorry to hear it. 

LiTTERLY. 

My old nurse's daughter — ! 



THE AMAZONS, 163 

NOELINE. 

Fudge ! 

LiTTERLY. 

Known her all my life ! 

NOELINE. 

Do your sisters kiss the head-gardener's sons ? 

LiTTERLY. 

Yes. No ! \_Following her.'] I say ! 

\_They sit together on the settee^ wrangling. 

Thomasin. 

[7b Shuter.] Come now, Sergeant, you might 
oblige a chap ! They've been on the roof since six 
o'clock. 

Shuter. 

I'd ring the alarm bell first ! How am /to get a 
bottle of wine ? 

Thomasin. 
You could wheedle it out of old Parker. 

Wilhelmina. 

Do, Shuter, darling ! \^Taking her arm coaxingly.] 
Monsieur de Grival is such a brave fellow. 

Thomasin. 
So's Tweeney ! 



i64 THE AMAZONS. 

Shuter. 

If I foraged for anybody it would be for his lord- 
ship over there. 

Thomasin. 
Litterly ! 

WiLHELMINA. 

We'll give Lord Litterly his share — do ! 

Shuter. 

M'lords, if I fetch you some refreshments will 
you promise me faithfully to get into that cupboard 
and stop there till I come back ? 

All. 
Yes. 

Shuter. 

No, no, not all of you ! Only my young gentle- 
men ! 

NOELINE. 

We understand, Sergeant. 

WiLHELMINA. 

Of course we will. 

Thomasin. 
Good man 1 

Shuter. 

Into the cupboard then ! Into the cupboard ! 

\The three girls hurry into the cupboard and 
close the door. Shuter unlocks the door 
that leads from the room. 



THE AMAZONS, 165 

LiTTERLY. 

[Going to her.'\ I say, Letty, 'pon my word you're 
a good sort. 

Shuter. 

I wouldn't do this for any living soul but you, 
m'lord. 

\_She waits, wiping her lips. He hesitates, 
annoyed, then kisses her. As he does so, 
the cupboard door opens and Noeline 
looks out, 

Noeline. 

[To herself, indignantly?^ Ah! \As Shuter de- 
parts, LiTTERLY turns and sees Noeline.] Oh ! 

[She withdraws her head. 

LiTTERLY. 

[7b himself.'] Spotted ! Just my luck ! 

De Grival. 

[Excitedly.'] Ha, Tweenwayes, my friend ! we 
are on the clover ! [Sittitig at the piano.] Ha, I 
enjoy myself like a deuce ! 

[He plays, rattling off a gay French melody. 

Tweenwayes. 

[To himself ?\ Thomasin is undoubtedly begin- 
ning to regard me with great warmth ! I've never 
felt quite like this in my life ; there's nothing I'm 



i66 THE AMAZONS, 

not capable of ! \_Leaping on to the horizontal bar 
and swinging to and fro a few times ^ then crying out 
in pain^ helplessly, '\ Oh ! Litterly ! Quick ! 

LiTTERLY. 

\<jroing to him and taking him down."] Hurt your- 
self, Tweeny ? 

TWEENWAYES. 

Heavens, yes ! 

[ITe walks in a stooping posture to the settee 
and sits, doubled-up, Litterly knocks at 
the cupboard door. 

Litterly. 
Lady Noeline ! Lady Noeline 

NOELINE. 

\_From within.'] What do you want ? 

Litterly. 
Please let me explain ! 

Noeline. 

[Opening the door, haughtily.'] Pray don't think 
that any explanation is necessary. 

Litterly. 

You see, if I didn't make it right with Letty 
Shuter — ! 



THE AMAZONS, 167 

NOELINE. 

Oh ! \_Coming out of the cupboard, in her cloak, 
shutting the door behind her,'] Oh, how I long for a 
quarter to eight. Overcote — the park — our gym. 
— I feel that nothing will ever be the same again ! 

[Pacing about, he following her protestiiigly. 

Thomasin. 

\_Popping her head out of the cupboard.] Here, 
Noel ! 

NOELINE. 

Go back, Tommy, at once ! 

Thomasin. 

I like that ! [Coming out in her cloak, shutting the 
door behind her and walking across to Tweenwayes.] 
Sneak ! 

Noeline. 

[Laying her head on the vaulting-horse, despair- 
ingly, ] You see how I am treated ! Oh, I wish I 
could undo the past few days ! 

LiTTERLY. 

Here ! I say ! Don't cry — ! 

[They sit together on the vaulting-horse. 

WiLHELMINA. 

[Putting her head out of the cupboard.] Tommy \ 
you know I can't bear the dark I 



i68 THE AMAZONS. 

De Grival. 
Ah, Wilhelmina ! Ah, my pretty girl ! 

WiLHELMINA. 

No, no ! 

\He takes her hand a?td brings her out of the 
cupboard. She is in her cloak. Thomasin 
and TwEENWAYES walk to-and-fro, 

TWEENWAYES. 

I assure you, Lady Thomasin, I attach no impor- 
tance whatever to the slight affray. We — we — 

Thomasin. 
Slight ! The poacher carried a loaded stick, 
Fitton said. 

TWEENWAYES. 

Possibly. Yes, I remember dashing it aside. 

Thomasin. 

Lucky for old Fitton you and De Grival were on 
the spot. 

TWEENWAYES. 

\Annoyed.'\ De Grival ! 

Thomasin. 
Yes, didn't he — 1 

TWEENWAYES. 

{Waving his hand disdainfully^ My dear Lady 
Thomasin ! 



THE AMAZONS. 169 

Thomasin. 
Why, Fitton gave us to understand — 

TWEENWAYES. 

That De Grival — ! Really ! 

\They walk away as Wilhelmina and De 
Grival come forward talking together. 

Wilhelmina. 

Ah, Monsieur de Grival, we — my sisters and I — 
can't thank you sufficiently. 

De Grival. 

Ah, please no — it thanks itself. Besides, how 
small a thing to do ! 

Wilhelmina. 

To save a man's life ! Why, perhaps but for 
Tweenwayes and yourself, Fitton would have 
been — 

De Grival. 

Tweenwayes ! 

Wilhelmina. 
Tweenwayes assisted you, Fitton told us. 

De Grival. 
Ha ! I laugh ! 

Wilhelmina. 
But Fitton said — 



I70 THE AMAZONS. 

De Grival. 

Absurd ! I describe it. Fitton was on the 
ground, with no sense, when I kick him. 

WiLHELMINA. 

When you kicked whom ? 

De Grival. 
Fitton. 

WiLHELMINA. 

You kicked poor Fitton ? 

De Grival. 
No, no, I mean Tweenwayes. 

WiLHELMINA. 

Why should you kick Tweenwayes ? 

De Grival. 

Ah, I am not telling it ! I — I — kick them all ! 
Don' cher know ! 

\The attention of De Grival and Wilhel- 
mina, Tweenwayes and Thomasin is 
attracted by Noeline and Litterly, who 
are sitting on the vaulting-horse^ their 
heads are closz together and Litterly's 
arm placed lightly round Noeline's aist. 



Thomasin. 



Noel! 



THE AMAZONS, 171 

WiLHELMINA. 

Oh, Noel ! 

Thomasin. 
Lord Litterly ! 

[LiTTERLY and Noeline hastily dismount and 
face the others. 

Litterly. 
Eh? What — what? 

Thomasin. 

\_Liste7iing^ Hark ! Here's the Sergeant ! Get 
back ! get back ! 

WiLHELMINA. 

\In a terrified whisper^ Oh, I didn't know I was 
out! 

\The three girls hurriedly return to the cup- 
board; Litterly throws himself full 
length on to the settee and whistles uncon- 
cernedly ; De Grival resumes his seat at 
the pia7io^ playing with much energy ; 
TwEENWAYES rushes to the horizontal bar 
and hangs there, without motion. Shuter 
enters, carrying a tray on which are a bot- 
tle of hock, some glasses, and a cake. Lit- 
terly rises, takes the tray from her, and 
places it on the table. Shuter relocks the 
door and looks round suspiciously, then she 
finds Wilhelmina's shoe which, in the 
scurry, has been dropped. 



172 THE AMAZONS. 

Shuter. 

\Picking up the shoe.'] Ah, the deceitful young 
devils ! \^She opens the cupboard door ; Noeline re- 
enters the room ; Thomasin following her. Wilhel- 
MiNA appears^ timidly^ searching for her shoe. 
Shuter produces it.] You've been out ! 

WiLHELMINA. 

I must have been ! 

Thomasin. 

[Coming between Shuter and Wilhelmina.] 
Now then ! Willy wasn't the first to break our 
promise. / was. 

Noeline. 

Nothing of the kind ! / was 1 How presuming 
you are, Tommy ! 

Shuter. 

Oh, you — you — you bad lot ! You — ! 

[LiTTERLY has filled the glasses, and now 
advances with the tray. 

LiTTERLY. 

Now, now, now ! We're all going to drink Letty 
Shuter's health. 

Shuter. 
[Mollified.'] Oh, m'lord — ! 

[LiTTERLY hands the tray from one to the other. 



THE AMAZONS. VJi 

TWEENWAYES. 

\To WiLHELMiNA.] After such stirring adven- 
tures, a glass of champagne is particularly accept- 
able. 

WiLHELMINA. 

It isn't champagne ; it's our dinner hock. 

TwEENWAYES. 

\To himself, bitterly?)^ We hate hock ! 

\He sits moodily. The girls place Shuter 
upon the vaulting-horse, 

LiTTERLY. 

Now ! Bumpers ! We drink long life and a sec- 
ond husband to Letitia Ann Shuter ! 

Thomasin. 
Letitia Ann Shuter ! Good man ! 

WiLHELMINA and NOELINE. 

Sergeant ! 

All. 
Sergeant Shuter ! 

\The toast is drunk with acclamation. 

De Grival. 

\At the piano again excitedly?^ Ah, we are having 
a good time ! If we danced we should like it. 



174 THE AMAZONS. 

Thomasin. 
Yes, yes ! Sergeant, rattle off something for us ! 

WiLHELMINA. 

Oh, no ! 

NOELINE. 

Tommy, be quiet ! 

Thomasin. 

" Binding the Wheatsheaf ! " The old dance we 
dug up at Drumdurris ! 

WiLHELMINA. 

Oh, yes ! Shuter knows that ! 

[Shuter takes De Q^vjmJ^ place at the piano. 

TWEENWAYES. 

\Putting on some torn and soiled gloves. '\ We — we 
are no dancers. 

\They dance a quaint country dance, beginning 
demurely and increasing in energy as they 
proceed. De Grival is dancing alone, 
very wildly a7id fantastically, when the 
door opens and Lady Castlejordan, 
who has apparefitly ope?ied the door with 
a key attached to her chatelaine, enters with 
Minchin. Lady Castlejordan stands 
as if sti^icken ; gradually the dancers fall 
back, with the exception of D'S. Grival, 
who does not see Lady Castlejordan and 
continues dancing. Then he discovers his 



THE AMAZONS, 175 

position and bolts into the cupboard. Lady 
Castlejordan sinks upon the settee^ look- 
ing before her with a fixed stare, and sit- 
ting motionless. Shuter is still playing 
gaily ; Minchin goes to her and taps her 
upon the shoulder ; she stops playing, 
turns, rises, looks round, and totters out at 
the door. 

Lady Castlejordan. 

What is it ? Roger Minchin ! I'm going mad, 
I think. What is it ? 

Minchin. 

Lady Noeline, you are the eldest of three, I still 
hope, not altogether worthless young women. But, 
upon my word, unless you instantly furnish some 
reasonable explanation of the presence of these gen- 
tlemen, I shall find myself guilty of wishing that 
you had never been born. 

Noeline. 
Mother, this is — my cousin — your nephew — 

[LiTTERLY comes forward. 

Lady Castlejordan. 
{^Staring at him."] What's that you say ? 

Noeline. 

Lord Litterly rendered me a great service in 
London, though I didn't know till this afternoon to 
whom I was indebted for it. 



176 THE AMAZONS. 

Lady Castlejordan. 
That young man at Overcote ! 

NOELINE. 

He came here to restore me a ring I had lost ; he 
didn't find out until he had entered the park that 
he was at Overcote. 

Lady Castlejordan. 
Cannot he make his own excuses t 

LiTTERLY. 

No, Lady Castlejordan, I can't; and I — I — I 
say, aunt Miriam — 

Lady Castlejordan. 

Stand away ! Who are the others ? There are 
others ! 

Thomasin. 

Mater — mater — Lord Tweenwayes — begs me 
to present him to you. 

Lady Castlejordan, 

Tweenwayes — ? 

[Tweenwayes, who has been under the 
vaulting-horse, is now half-way up the 
rope. He bows from that elevated posi- 
tion. 

Tweenwayes. 

Lady Castlejordan, I rejoice to find myself at 
Overcote Hall. We — we — 



THE AMAZONS. 177 

Lady Castlejordan. 

[7J? Thomasin.] I see ! The result of your stay 
at Drumdurris under Egidia's care ! I am mightily 
obliged to her ! 

TWEENWAYES. 

I take the present opportunity — 

MiNCHIN. 

\Enraged.'\ Come down ! 

[TwEENWAYES descends rapidly. 

WiLHELMINA. 

\Faintly?^ Mother dear — Monsieur de Grival — 

Lady Castlejordan. 
[Raising her head.'\ What ! the other ! 

WiLHELMINA. 

[Looking around."] Andre ! Andre ! 

[MiNCHiN opens the outer door and calls De 
Grival. No one appears. The others call 
De Grival with the same result. Lit- 
TERLY enters the cupboard indignantly ; 
there is a short pause and then De Grival 
is shot out into the centre of the room. Lit- 
TERLY re-enters more leisurely. 

Lady Castlejordan. 

\Glaring at De Grival.] So that is — the 
Frenchman ? 



178 THE AMAZONS. 

De Grival. 

French by birth, yes. But so long educated in 
England : English in my appearance, manner, voice 
— English to my backbone. Do I not play your 
games, follow your sport — ? 

MiNCHiN and Litterly. 
Hush ! hush ! 

WiLHELMINA. 

\To De Grival, presenting him formally^ Mon- 
sieur Andre de Grival — Lady Castlejordan, my 
mother. 

De Grival. 

\With a profound dow.] Ah, Lady Castlejordan, 
damitall ! [There is a general protest of " No .>"'] 

MiNCHIN. 

Upon my soul, sir — ! 

De Grival. 

Ah, I do not say the right word ! I mistake it ! 
I despair! 

MiNCHiN and Litterly. 

Hush! hush! 

De Grival. 

I rave madly ! To-night I stab my throat ! Don' 
cher know ! 



THE AMAZONS, 179 

WiLHELMINA. 

Oh ! [De Grival is dragged back by Litterly. 

Lady Castlejordan. 

\Rising?^ Roger Minchin, I wish to speak to my 
eldest child. Take these gentlemen away for a few 
moments. [Minchin beckons the mefi, who quietly 
retire into the cupboard.'] Noel ! [Minchin /Az<r^j- a 
chair for Lady Castlejordan.] Noel, I went to 
town to receive a statement from Florence Vipont's 
maid, Dawkins. 

NOELINE. 

Oh ! Treacherous creature ! 

Lady Castlejordan. 

The woman declares you sallied out the other 
night in young Robert Vipont's clothes. Is it true ? 

NOELINE. 

Perfectly. Surely ^^2/ can have no objection to 
such a proceeding, mother ? 

Lady Castlejordan. 
Noel! 

Minchin. 

\_Skaking a finger at Lady Castlejordan.] Hah ! 

Lady Castlejordan. 

But you didn't return till early morning, according 
to Dawkins. You've never heard me say I like that 
in a young man ? 



i8o THE AMAZONS. 

NOELINE. 

No, mother, but I got mixed up in a street-fight, 
through protecting a girl from a brute who was go- 
ing to hit her. I punched him, mother ! 

Lady Castlejordan. 
What ? 

MiNCHIN. 

You did ? 

Lady Castlejordan. 
In the pubUc street ? Before people ? 

NOELINE. 

You've had me taught to do such things ! 

MiNCH'N. 

Hah! 

Lady Castlejordan. 
In the presence of strangers — never ! 

NOELINE. 

After I'd done it I ran away, and fainted in a by- 
turning. 

Lady Castlejordan. 

Fainted ! My — son ! 

NOELINE. 

But, luckily, Lord Litterly came along and picked 
me up and carried me home to his lodgings — 



THE AMAZONS. i8i 

Lady Castlejordan. 

Oh ! My daughter ! 

[MiNCHiN joins WiLHELMiNA and Thoma- 
SIN, and talks with them. 

NOELINE. 

This morning he recognised me in Chesham 
Street and followed me here to return a ring I'd 
dropped in his room. 

Lady Castlejordan. 
[Facing to and fro. ] Disgraceful ! disgraceful ! 

NOELINE. 

Yes, mother, it is disgraceful ! But it will serve 
everybody a good turn if it teaches us that, after all, 
your children are nothing but ordinary, weak, affec- 
tionate, chicken-hearted young women ! 

Lady Castlejordan. 
Noel ! 

NOELINE. 

{Stamping her foot.] No ! Noeline from this 
moment ! Noeline ! Noeline ! 

MiNCHIN. 

Lady Castlejordan, I really think it due to Lord 
Tweenwayes and Monsieur de Grival that you 
should know they have stood you in good stead 
during your absence. 



i82 THE AMAZONS. 

Lady Castlejordan. 
Mr. Minchin? 

MiNCHIN. 

As the result of their perfectly inexcusable pres- 
ence in your park, old Fitton the keeper has been 
rescued from the murderous clutches of a most de- 
termined poacher — 

Thomasin. 

Quite true, mater — Tweenwayes may be bred a 
bit too fine, but, in an emergency, he's a demon. 

WiLHELMINA. 

You should hear what Fitton says of Andrd. 

Minchin. 
I'll enquire about this. {^Hegoes out 

Lady Castlejordan. 

Fitton or no Fitton, this shameful introduction of 
men into Overcote — ! 

Thomasin. 
If we're boys, we must have pals ! 

WiLHELMINA. 

The misery is we're neither one thing nor the 
other ! 

Lady Castlejordan. 

In the gymnasium ! Dancing ! {Looking round^ 

And drinking ! 



THE AMAZONS, 183 

Thomasin. 

A bottle of Rudesheimer. If one man can't give 
another a glass of wine — ! 

Lady Castlejordan. 

\Furiously.'\ Into your frocks ! Into your 
frocks ! 

WiLHELMINA, ThOMASIN and NOELINE. 

Frocks ! 

Lady Castlejordan. 

Into your frocks ! \_Sinkmg i?ito the chair ?[ And 
never, never, never come out of them ! 

[Thomasin and Wilhelmina^6> to the door.'\ 

WiLHELMINA. 

[Sobbing^^ I — I — I've felt ashamed of my ap- 
pearance for ever so long ! I own it. \_She goes out. 

Thomasin. 

[^RebelliouslyJ] All right, turn me into a girl! 
But look here, I shall be just the sort of young lady 
that's likely to be an awful failure in the end ! 

\_She goes out. 
Noeline. 
[^Pointing to the cupboard^ Mother, don't forget 
they're in there. 

Lady Castlejordan. 
Ah, I had forgotten. 



i84 THE AMAZONS, 

NOELINE. 

I — I hope you'll — like Litterly. 

Lady Castlejordan. 
You hope I will like — \_suddenly\ do you ? 

NOELINE. 

Yes. [^S^e goes out. 

Lady Castlejordan. 

Noeline ! Come back ! Is it possible ? My 
brain reels ! \_She goes to the door, opeiis and shuts 
it, then goes and opens the cupboard door. Calling 
sternly.'] Lord Tweenwayes — Monsieur de Grival 
— Lord Litterly. [Tweenwayes appears, encounters 
Lady Castlejordan and retreats.] Lord Tween- 
wayes ! 

[Tweenwayes appears agai?i, bows appre- 
hensively to Lady Castlejordan, and 
sidles round the cupboard door. De 
Grival enters, bows to Lady Castlejor- 
dan, and edging away from her, joins 
Tweenwayes. Litterly enters. 

Litterly. 
\^Meekly.'\ You desire to — t 

Lady Castlejordan. 

To demand that you instantly leave Overcote and 
to tell you that I can find no words in which — 

Litterly. 
Aunt Miriam — ! 



THE AMAZONS. 185 

Lady Castlejordan. 

Aunt ! How dare you remind me of our relation- 
ship ! How dare you — ! 

\_Fausing and staring at him, 

LiTTERLY. 

Eh? You're not well — 

Lady Castlejordan. 

Have you ever been told that you have your late 
uncle's eyes ? 

LiTTERLY. 

My father often says I recall his brother Jack. 

Lady Castlejordan. 

Why, if your hair wasn't quite so short — and if 
it was curly just there — and if you were an inch 
taller — and hadn't such an odious town air — oh! 

\_She grasps his arms impulsively^ then falls 
back with an exclamation. 

LiTTERLY. 

Aunt ! 

Lady Castlejordan. 

\_Again grasping his arms.'] Pardon me ! [^Leav- 
ing him.] Mercy ! His muscles are like my 
Jack's ! 

MiNCHiN enters. 



i86 THE AMAZONS. 



MiNCHIN. 



\To Lady Castlejordan.] My dear Lady Cas- 
tlejordan, Fitton happened to be in the game- 
larder. He certainly has told me a story of almost 
incredible dash and presence of mind on the part of 
Lord Tweenwayes and Monsieur de Grival — 

Lady Castlejordan. 

[TJ? MiNCHiN.] Yes, yes, yes. Mr. Minchin, 
don't you see an extraordinary likeness in Litterly 
to my Jack ? 

Minchin. 

There is a suggestion — 

Lady Castlejordan. 

A suggestion ! Mr. Minchin, what — what ought 
I to do 1 \^A deep gong sounds in the distance. 

Minchin. 

Dinner ! What ought you to do ? Begin at once 
to distract your girls' thoughts from the follies of 
the past! Demonstrate with as little delay as 
possible that you can be a reasonable mother! 
{^Glancing towards the men.'] Ask 'em to dine. 

Lady Castlejordan. 
What! 

Minchin. 

They're all more or less injured ; they must be all 
more or less hungry ; be more or less hospitable. 



THE AMAZONS. 187 

Lady Castlejordan. 
No, no ; if I ask anybody it shall be only Litterly. 

MiNCHIN. 

Why only Litterly ? 

Lady Castlejordan. 
He's so like my Jack ! He's so like my Jack ! 

MiNCHIN. 

You can't invite one blackguard without the 
others. 

Lady Castlejordan. 

A blackguard ! When he is so like my Jack ! 

Noeline, Wilhelmina, afid Thomasin enter 
dressed in demi-toilette for dinner. 

MiNCHIN. 

{Triumphantly?^ Hah! hah! 

Lady Castlejordan. 

\To MiNCHIN, proudly?^ Oh, yes, aren't they 
beautiful girls! \Add7'essing the three men.] Lord 
Tweenwayes, Lord Litterly, Monsieur de Grival, as 
you see, I am still in my early-morning gown. On 
the score of dress therefore I beg you will have no 
hesitation in giving me the honour of your company 
at dinner. 

iThe girls, uttering little cries ^ sit suddenly 
upon the settee. 



1 88 THE AMAZONS. 

TWEENWAYES. 

Lady Castle Jordan — ! 

De Grival. 
Ah, I shall delight to eat ! 

LiTTERLY. 

You're very good, my dear aunt ! 

\The girls rise and gather round their mother^ 
kissing and embracing her, 

NOELINE. 

Oh, mother! 

WiLHELMINA. 

Mother dear ! 

Thomasin. 

Good business ! 

[LiTTERLY and Minchin meet and shake 
hands, 

De Grival. 
\_Flourishing the Indian dubsl\ La, la, la ! 

TwEENWAYES. 

[Swinging on the horizontal bar."] We carry 
everything before us! \^The gong sounds again. 



THE AMAZONS. 189 

Lady Castlejordan. 
Lord Tweenwayes — 

[TwEENWAYES cotnes with great dignity to 
Lady Castlejordan. The girls fall 
back. 

Lady Castlejordan. 

Lord Litterly — Lady Noeline. Monsieur de 
Grival — Lady Wilhelmina. Mr. Minchin — Lady 
Thomasin. 

\The couples are formed^ and all go out sedately. 



THE end 



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NEW PLAYS AND BOOKS 

— — Season 1925 



BOSTON THEATRE GUILD PLAYS 

With an introduction by Frank W. C. Hersey, A.M., 
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Sallie Kemper, — three males, two females. "Dorinda Dares" 
by Angela Morris, — two males, two females. "Buying ^ 
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These unusual plays have been selected because they were 
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situation — a situation not huddled and inarticulate, but 
amplified and vocal with emotion. During its six seasons, 
the Guild has presented about thirty-six plays — the five 
herein printed are the pick of the lot. Each play commands 
a five dollar production royalty — the volume, bound in a 
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Price, $1.25 per copy. 

FOLK LORE FROM MAMMY DAYS 

By Mary Johnson Blackburn 

The genuine black Mammy sleeps with her generation, and 
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Send for a Copy of our New Free Catalogue. 
It Describes More Than a Thousand Plays, 

BAKER'S PLAYS, BOSTON, MASS. 



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NEW PLAYS AND BOOKS 

Season 1925 



AFTER THE CURTAIN FALLS By William M. Blatt 

These playlets are reveries following the reading of three 
Shakespearian plays, — "Henry V," "Much Ado About Noth- 
ing," and "The Merchant of Venice." There is no feeling at 
the end of a Shakespeare Comedy that the machinery has 
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on the contrary it must be a reader with little imagination 
who does not picture the characters living on beyond the 
curtain. That_ is what has been done in this collection. 
Prince Henry is seen after his edict of banishment against 
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are seen in their home, trying to live the tame domestic life. 
Shylock is seen struggling against the tide of fate, and Jessica 
after her unpropitious marriage. All of the characters are 
from the plays except two servants. The sketches, though 
supplementary, are complete in themselves. Each has a 
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The three plays in one volume. Price, 50 cents. 

CAPTAIN DREW ON LEAVE By Hubert Henry Davies 

A comedy in four acts. Fournaales, three females. Two 
simple sets. It is our privilege this season to publish another 
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MAN UNDER THE BED By Katharine Metcalf Roof 

A farce-comedy in one act. A short comedy of youth with 
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